Wednesday, later.
We arrived at the Eiffel tower and the mood amongst the group was strained to say the least. Everyone was tired and cranky, Ana and I had spoken another word to each other and Tom was being his usual self, moody and strange.
I sighed as I looked towards the long queue for the tower, wondering if it was even worth it. I was petrified of heights, my mood was awful and if Tom spoke out of line to me once more today, I would probably launch him right off the top of the tower. Then I'd get arrested and spend the rest of my life picking lice from my hair and eating sloppy prison food.
I decided it was probably not a good idea.
“I think I'm going to bail on this.” I said to Val.
Val's eyes widened. “What, no, you can't, I'm scared, I was counting on having you on my left and Nikki on my right, I had it all planned, you can't leave me, please, please.... please!” She was in a panic.
I felt bad. “Fine.” I said, looking at Tom through squinted eyes in the sunshine. He was laughing with Ana, joking about her height. “Make sure you don't fall over the edge!” Nikki had said and Tom had laughed loudly and pointed out that she probably wouldn't even see over the edge, let alone fall over it. Ana playfully hit his arm and glanced over at me before sighing and turning away again.
I felt like shit, to put it mildly.
“Hey.” Someone said behind me. I jumped out of my skin. “Whoa, sorry! Didn't mean to scare you.” I turned to see a familiar face that had no name. He was from our class but we'd never spoken before.
“You're the new girl, right?” He asked. I nodded, sick of that title already. “Ah, I'm Adam.” He smiled.
Adam is tall, very tall. Muscular, with a full sleeve of tattoos, well, I assume so. He had tattoos from the line of his tshirt sleeve to his wrist. “You like tattoos?” He asked, noticing me staring.
“They're cool, if they tell a story. Tattoos that are just there for the sake of it are just silly in my opinion.” I said.
Adam smiled and nodded.
“I think the exact same.” He said.
Before I had chance to reply, Jasmine was at my side telling me to join them in the queue. “Can Adam come?” I asked.
Jasmine nodded.
“I don't see why not.” She smiled.
She was was always so nice to everyone, I guess that's why I liked her so much.
We eventually got inside the tower itself, taking a lift to the first floor before piling out to begin climbing the stairs to the second floor. The views already turned my stomach.
“The breeze is nice!” Jay announced, his hair blowing in the wind as he took pictures. His reply from us all was a chorus of groans and “Shut up, Jay!”s. Apart from Tom who remained silent.
The final floor before the top was worst.
Val decided it was too much and stayed on the second floor with Nikki, Nathan, Ana and Siva.
Kumar and Jasmine were excitable, Tom was silent and Sally was standing staring at her feet.
Jay put his arm around her, quietly comforting her and telling her that thousands of people come here every week and there are never any news reports of any accidents. She nodded and thanked him but her eyes remained fixed on her shoes.
Adam asked if I was okay, which I replied with a brave nod. Truthfully, I was close to wetting myself, as classy as that sounds.
“Come here.” Adam said, putting his arm around me, sensing I was not being completely honest with him. The glass doors closed and the seven of us waited to be transported upwards.
Imagine the Eiffel tower in your head, got it?
We're currently travelling up the long part in the middle before the top part. There are four lifts to each side and we're occupying one.
I reminded myself of the fact there were three other lifts full of people and it calmed me. Sort of. I rested my head against Adam's chest and closed my eyes, the journey seeming like a lifetime.
The lift finally stopped and I opened my eyes, the first sight I saw was Tom. For a second he looked sad, vulnerable, his eyelids blinking many times as he watched Adam and I.
He noticed me looking and snapped out of it, back to the vacant stare through the glass window of the lift.
The wind hit us as we stepped out and Jay's face was a picture. He was like a child on Christmas Day, so excited.
Jamsine and Kumar began taking selfies against the metal cage, keeping everyone safe. “Don't drop your phones.” I joked. Jasmine's eyes widened at the thought.
Adam's face turned white and he stayed away from the edge. “I think.... I'm going to go back to the lift. I'll wait for you there.” He said. I ignored him, my eyes fixated on Tom again.
Tom was staring over the edge, a small smile in the corner of his mouth. It worried me and fascinated me at the same time.
“Come here.” He said, without moving, without turning around.
“I can't.” I said, fear glueing me to the spot. I gulped, watching as Sally's fear melted away, laughing with Jay.
Tom turned and stretched out his hand, silently calling me to him.
“Trust me.” He whispered.
“After last time?” I asked, frowning slightly.
He sighed. “That was different.” He murmured.
I blinked and took his hand, mine cold, his warm.
He stood behind me, his arm around me but his hands on the cage, his fingers hooked through the loops of it.
“You see all of those people down there?” He whispered over my shoulder. I nodded, petrified. “They look like ants.” I said, quietly.
The wind was hitting my face and it was sore, my eyes streaming from the impact of the wind in my eyes. “Those people down there could be from anywhere in this world, any age, any race, any gender. They could be in love, they could be alone, searching for someone, they could be heartbroken, getting over someone....” His voice drifted off and I wondered where he was taking this conversation.
“So many people in this world. Enough people to replace you, to move on to... It makes me wonder if anyone would miss me if I was gone.” He whispered. His voice was serious, scaring me more than the height we were at.
“Of course people would miss you. They'd never replace you, they'd try their best to mend their broken heart. They'd tell stories about you to those people and laugh about the good times. They'd seek comfort for the bad times, not revenge.” I replied.
I heard Tom laugh quietly and imagined the smirk that was inevitably on his face.
“Even the bad times like almost causing someone to fall into a river and drown?” He asked.
“Even that.” I replied, my heart pounding now.
“That's what I like about you. Even when I do something shitty, you find a way to be nice about it.” He said.
Then he turned me around and kissed me, and just like that, my fears melted away.
