Times running out⏱️🖤

Time is fading💔

My time is fading away I'm fading away from life, my heart and soul Im nothing I'm just laying in the sand trapped in a maze I was looking at stars at night and now all I see is darkness surrounding me and my body. Ive fallen into an internal darkness the darkness is consuming me and my life I hate myself I'm never gonna be good enough or anything. I can't be like my sister or brother I don't get good grades and I'm not a good person even if people say I am I know their lying they always do. I've always felt like nothing like I'm not good enough and I'm never going to be I know I'll never be.. I can never be good enough for my siblings, parents and etc. Before I go to sleep I cry and I
cry until my tears are like waves you know they could come but you don't know when they come. I beat myself up until my heart and mind can't take the pain anymore (so basically when I'm alone). I've always thought that everyone around me was against me they wanted to hurt me and forget me I can't find a way out. As I lay In the maze burried under dirt I'm thinking of how much shit I've put me and my family through and then I think about how much I want to just scream for help. But then I realized that no one listens or understands how I feel or how much I hate myself I hate the most not good at writing or anything else I'm not even good at speaking or standing up for myself. I'm trapped I'm lost and no one can find me because who would be looking?. Laying here in the maze is like drowning except I'm not moving my body is still but I'm moving in my head after laying there for more then a year. I close my eyes and suddenly I feel the chains slide off of me" I'm free" (I say to myself) i was finally free I was myself but I was gone I let go of all my worries, guilt and pain I did it I let go before someone saved me. Because I knew no one would💔.

I hope you guys like this poem/thoughts I haven't been that active because of what going on with myself and my mind. I know no ones going to read this but thank you guys for letting me be myself and express myself and how I feel.🙏❤️