Just Let Go

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            Spock sat in his quarters, trying to get his breathing back to normal. He had his eyes closed and was slowly calming down when there was a knock on the door.

            “Enter,” he said, opening his eyes. The door opened and Nyota Uhura walked in slowly.

            “Nyota, what can I do for you?” Spock asked politely, trying to appear normal.

            “You can tell me how you’re doing,” Nyota said, walking over to him.

            “I am fine,” he said stoically.

            “Spock,” she said disbelievingly, “Come on, I know you better than that. Talk to me.”

            “I… do not know what to say,” Spock admitted, “I– I have been emotionally compromised. I am supposed to be able to repress my emotions and yet I was unable to.”

            “Spock you just lost your mother and your entire home planet,” Nyota said, “Being emotional is completely normal and totally understandable.”

            “But I do not know how to act,” Spock said, trying to stop his hands from trembling, “I do not know what to do with all these things I am feeling.”

            “You let it out,” Nyota said quietly, putting her hands on either side of his face, “I know that’s something you don’t really know how to do, but you can do it.”

            “I cannot…” he started, looking away from her.

            “You can.” Nyota told him, turning his face back to hers, “Spock, I won’t judge you. I love you and that’s what I’m here for. Just let go.” Spock stared at her and, even though he had a hard time reading emotions, he could see nothing but love and devotion in her eyes. Spock leaned forward and buried his face in Nyota’s shoulder. She wrapped her arms around him and wasn’t surprised when, a few minutes later, she felt the shoulder of her shirt dampen.

            “Shhh, its okay,” she whispered in his ear, “Shhh, I’m right here. That’s it, let it out.” Spock made no noise as he cried, but Nyota could feel him shaking. After a while she could feel him leaning forward more and knew he was tired.

            “Come on,” she said as she helped him up, “Let’s get you to bed.” Spock collapsed on the bed as Nyota helped him out of his shirt. After changing into a pair of Spock’s limited amount of comfy clothes, she climbed in next to him. Nyota gently pulled on hum until he was wrapped in her arms with his head lying on her chest. She began stroking his dark hair and eventually they both fell asleep.

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