30 Day LGBT Challenge *COMPLETE*

Day 5: Coming Out Story.

I actually came out to my parents Five Months Ago...

I knew that I was Bisexual in the fifth grade. I know that at that time, I was extreamly young, and that most people don't know until they are older but... Hey! That's how young I was!

In sixth grade, I had suffered from depression and sucide. In 2017 of the summer on July 26, My best friend Rose Gonzalez died... It was a really hard time for myself to deal with, and I still stuggle with her death and it's almost been a year... But I need to stick to the story here....

My parents got a call from the office saying that several students reported seeing scars on my wrists and burns on my legs... And.... It was true...

My parents have gotten other calls, but not in awhile. And it was mostly about me saying that I wanted to die... And that I wanted to kill myself.... And I did... My parents were furious. After getting previous calls, and therapy apointments, they thought that it was over. 

(It was not)

I told my parents how I felt... and I showed them the cuts on my arms and wrists, and burns on my ancles. They were crying. They never believed that I would do self harm. They didn't know that it was that bad. 

They asked if I needed to tell them something else... Relating to my ex girlfriend...

I looked down at my lap from the chair that i was sitting on... I didn't think that I should throw on them that I WASN'T STRAIGHT after they just found out that I was doing self harm... 

But... I took a few deep breaths, and after crying for ten minutes just trying to say those three words.

( I'm not straight... I'm not straight.... I'm not straight...) "It's that simple! I just have to say those three words!" I said to myself.

I looked at my parents straight in the eyes who were across the dining room table. 

I felt guilt already and how they would judge me.... They always wanted to have the talk with me about boys, and what to do on dates... "They would never approve..." I thought.

I looked at them with tears falling down my face, and tugging my wavy hair just to speak up and tell them the truth!  

And finally... I opened my mouth... and told them...

"I'm... I'm not straight..." I said looking immediantly back at my lap. Looking down made it easier not to see how they were going to judge me... It felt like protection of some sort...

My father said for me to look back up at their faces. I did. I slowly raised my head up and and looked at their faces which were giving a slight smirk. 

"I'm so glad that you told us. We were wondering when you would finally tell us" My father told me.

"Wait... you guys knew?..." I said wiping off the tears from my eyes with my arm.

" Yeah, Emma. I went up to your room to make sure that the lights were turned off, and I saw a lot of stuff like love notes, and drawings that one of your friends gave you. we know that you like boys and girls, and I am fine with that, I accept you for who you are." My father says giving me a smile that tells me that eveything will be okay. 

So... my parents knew! And here I was crying feeling like I was going to literally die after I told them! And they freaking knew! I was honestly so stunned and shocked! I thought that my parents would'nt accept me, or  that they would throw me out of the house on the streets...

it was an extremely emotionally filled day but I'm glad that i told them. It was really hard to come out to my parents and loved ones. Especailly my grandmother who is really religious... That's another story that maybe I will post! LOL I hope that you guys liked this emotionally filled chapter. I was out of town for a few days last weekend, so I didn't post the chapters that I was supposed to... Sorry people! 

I'll see you all next time!