F (rewriting)

30%

I hesitate. Do I really want this? Am I so sure it's the right decision for me? Considering how things have been going, I probably should get this off my chest. Just be straight forward and speak as plainly as possible, no stuttering. Lay it all down on the table.
But I don't want to. I don't want to have to deal with the consequences of what I'm about to do. The amount of time it'll take and how restless my nights will become.
I raise my hand to the door ready to knock. I hesitate. No, I'm not going to do this. It's a stupid idea.
Just as I leave, I hear shuffling on the other side. The person is in the room. What if they saw me? Maybe I get lucky.
"Gigi!" No luck. I turn around to face Mrs. Lee, a fake smile plastered on my face. "Were you waiting outside the door?" She asks clearly knowing the answer. Well here goes all my free time.
"Yes, actually, I was wondering if in any way I could get e-" I can't say it. "Ext-" Nope, the words ain't coming out.
"Extra work?" She questions and I nod my head slowly.
"Yes, that." She nods her head at me and gestures for me to follow her into the classroom.
"This is the first time you've ever done this." There is a pause. "Wow, I'm impressed." She looks through all her notes. All I can do is watch. I don't know what to say. "Mrs. Kim's classes must really be helping you! Especially since your grade has gone up by a bit!" She looks so enthusiastic as she hands me a bunch of sheets of paper. I smile weakly back at her nodding my head. "I'm so glad! See? I told you, you would understand it one day!" I giggle nervously at her statement. It's not that I understand it, but I just want to pass. No, I need to pass.
Yesterday, my letter from The Seoul Institute of Performing Arts came, waiting for me on the kitchen counter. I couldn't believe my eyes when it said I was accepted. I cried for so long my mom though I was having a mental breakdown. I might as well have been.
But, they sent me a separate paper with the expected grades they need for me to actually physically attend the institute. Most of the required grades I was already getting. Except for math. Of course it was math. They request at least a B- in the final examination for my course. I don't know why, don't ask me! Now, to actually look at the problem, they want a B-, but I'm currently standing on an F, if anything barely a D-, but F nevertheless. That means my grade has to improve by the least, what, 30% by the end of the year!
I take the papers from Mrs Lees hand with a thank you and turn to leave.
"You'll get the grade, don't worry!" I turn around confused to face Mrs Lee. How does she- "your mother told me..." she says sympathetically. Of course she did. I smiled back at her, reply with a thank you and leave the classroom.
Once I'm out, I exhale. Hard. The papers in my hand catch my attention and as I read over the first questions I realise how I'm going to regret this. When I talked with my mum about maybe getting extra work she was on board. I mean, why wouldn't she be. But in the same discussion she mentioned a part time job, simply because I asked for money for the train. Not only do I have to work in mathematics far more than I would prefer to, but I'm expected to get a job. How am I supposed to make time for everything?
I'm halfway down the corridor when the entrance to the film hall appears. My eyes glance at the announcement on the wall 4 weeks left. Fours weeks left to what? And that's when it hits me like a smack to the face: the film I'm meant to make. The Social Personified Documentation. I mentally give myself another slap. I'm going to need at least a week and half editing, leaving me with only about two weeks to really film anything. How am I meant to do all of this? I really put too much pressure this time.
The slight breeze shuffles the papers in my hand - 30%.

At the lunch table I pay no attention to the discussion. My eyes scan the people of my school, analysis their every move. Who would be interesting enough to film? No one seems like they have any deep dark secrets or scary past that I can discover. No one is eccentric enough to make a full movie. But maybe that's what it is. It doesn't have to be exciting or new, because life is boring, simple.
"Gigi?" My eyes snap towards Val. "You alright?"
"Yeah, just a little stressed because of the film I have to make." The girls nod their head.
"Do you not have a plan or what?" Maria asks from beside me. I shake my head no.
"I just don't have a person: if I get the person I know what I'll do." They nod again and then Vals eyes pop.
"What about Taehyung?" She wiggles her eyebrows and the girls agree with her statement. I never thought about asking Tae to be the main character of my film. Maybe it'll work. Maybe. My thoughts are disrupted by a long figure sitting next to me.
"Hey." Bambam takes the empty seat and puts his lunch on the table followed by the rest of his friend group. They drag another table to connect it to ours. The girls and I are all staring confused.
"Thought we could, you know, sit together since we've gone out a few times." Namjoon says smiling. A few people around us are giving us questioning looks but other than that, this appears completely normal. At least to the rest of the dudes in our tear. The girls though- they've practically all turned to steam. I feel a nudge on my arm.
"Is it okay? If we sit here?" Bambam looks hopeful and I nod my head. Why not, it could prove a good thing.
"So, Gigi" my attention is brought to Jungkook. "Have you thought about that movie?" He asks. I shake my head no.
"You?" He moved into my class this year since they only made one. Too many people dropped it as a subject.
"Yeah, I'm filming Tae and Jimin. Their friendship." Shit. There goes my only good option. Vals' hand strokes my arm. "What's wrong ?" He asks.
"Nothing, Nothing. I just don't have anyone to film."
"I'll do it!" The volume of Bambam voice makes him heard all the way back to Thailand. "I'll do it." He says it a lot quieter and his stare tells me that there may be another reason as to why he wants to be my actor. At this point however, I don't care. I really need someone willing to film almost everyday.
"You sure? It takes a lot of time." He nods his head so quickly I'm scared it'll fall off. I giggle at his enthusiastic character. "Ok, fine. We can start filming tomorrow. I'll text you the details." His smile gets even wider and then drops.
"Oh, I changed my number, let me put the new one in." I reach for my phone and hand it to him. From the corner of my eye I can tell Andy has a weird feeling about this collaboration. Honestly, I do too. "There you go."
I glance at the name he set himself, BamBae. He grins at me and allo can do is laugh.
"Ok, sweet. I'll text you later." He nods his head, letting the day go on as close to normal as usual.