NOT WHAT YOU EXPECTED

2 || Alana's story

[alana]

A few years ago, when I was in my freshman year of high school, I ran away from home.

I didn't just run away from home because I got tired of living by the rules that were set in my house, I ran away because I got tired of feeling like my mom and I were living like robots.

I got tired of constantly having to listen and go by whatever the hell my mom's boyfriend told us to do. Whatever he commanded we did. It had been like that for 4 years.

After my mom and dad got divorced, when I was only in elementary school, my mom went into this weird phase of her life where she would leave me alone or with one of her friends, while she was out doing a bunch of crazy shit.

I guess one night she decided to go to a bar and that's where she met her boyfriend, Thomas.

Thomas has always been a creep.

He's never done anything like touch me inappropriately or anything, he's just always given me a weird vibe. And even though I didn't know much about vibes or what that word even meant when I was in elementary school, I knew something felt off whenever Thomas was around.

He started off not that bad, but as the years passed I guess he felt like he had more and more control and began to boss around my mom and I.

As Thomas became more controlling him and my mom's relationship became more toxic.

I remember one day in middle school I came home, excited to show my mom my report card cause I had finally gotten all good grades and a good teacher comment, but when I walked in the house all I heard was yelling and things being thrown around upstairs in their room.

That day I didn't sleep at home. I left the report card on the kitchen counter and walked back out. I ended up sleeping at my friends house. Lauren. She's the one I went to when things were rough at home.

If I walked in the house and I heard any type of argument going on I would leave and just go to Lauren's house. Her parents were concerned at one point because I would stay for long periods of time, but they couldn't really do anything because all I could say I witnessed was arguing, and what could they tell the police? "Oh her parents are always arguing." They would probably look at them like they were insane.

I never knew If Thomas hit my mother or not.

Eventually Thomas got tired of me not coming home whenever I heard them arguing so one day he sat me down and scolded me for leaving without permission. And he threatened to beat me if I ever did it again.

From that point on I just had to deal with all their fights and arguments.

When I got to eighth grade they stopped arguing so much and that's when the controlling really began. My mom just stopped putting up a fight and Thomas took that and used it to his advantage.

He began controlling when my mom and I could leave the house, what time we had to be home, when we had to eat dinner, what we couldn't eat, he controlled the things we said. It was a mess.

At one point my mom was pregnant but she lost the baby due to stress.

A lot of the time I felt like my mom was so "in-love" with Thomas that she never thought about me and how he was effecting my life.

One night, I snuck out to try and find my dad's house because I wanted to check out his living situation and ask if I could live with him, but that failed and I ended up coming back home at an hour that was "too-late" according to Thomas' rules, and him and I got into an argument that ended up being blown way out of proportion.

I got sent up to my room.

And as I sat there for a few minutes I realized I didn't want to deal with him and his bs anymore so I packed 2 bags filled with a bunch of random clothes and other necessities that I would need, and I was gone.