the best kind of broken

e i g h t

s t u d i o

the day went by smoothly as we continued writing the album, and recorded pieces of each of the songs, pausing only to eat, grab some water or to freshen up. we've had rehearsals all week, and have barely had a break from the different studios.

everyday i've been anxious to head home because i knew that at any moment my afternoon routine could be interrupted by those bright blue eyes that belonged to kaidance.

every afternoon that follows the day in the studio, is usually more times than not, the same as the day before... i stroll out to the van, as tired as a sloth, and head in the direction of home, but not before stopping at the corner coffee shop. the boys usually drop me off and continue home, leaving me with some time to my self and a place to think. i then usually continue to walk through the park, because our fans aren't usually around as it is out of the way, and isn't a very popular part of la. i eventually end up at home, feeling good with the day that had just happened, and i'm relaxed, and ready for dinner.

however, now, knowing that kaidance and jess visit this coffee shop on a regular basis now, made me shift uncomfortably in my seat, with a sense of nervousness within me that i couldn't quite explain.

the sound of the car engine turning off catches me out of my thoughts as the journey to the coffee shop gets interrupted.

"jonah?" i hear from behind me, earning a questioning, yet concerned look from jack.

"yeah? what?" i reply. confused as to why the whole car was silent and glancing in my direction.

"corbyn just asked you like three times if you wanted us to stop in at the coffee shop for you?"

i snapped my face to look at corbyn? noticing that the car was stopped and we were parked outside the coffee shop, the boys clearly waiting for me to hop out of the car.

"dude, what's up with you today? you've been so out of it?" zach questioned sincerely, leaning over daniel so he could see my face from behind.

"i don't know— nothing. i'm— uhh i'm fine. thanks guys, i'll see you at home later." i quickly scrambled out of the car before the boys could ask anymore questions.

i made my way through the front doors peering around the space before my gaze landed on those particular blue eyes, as my stomach erupted into a zoo of butterflies.

🥀

"let's go get some coffee then?" I suggested, after hearing jess complain for a solid 20 minutes about how exhausted she is because of the stress she's had at work.

we both ended up finding casual work at local companies where we spend most of our days. i work at the grocery store down the street every weekday, with my hours changing each day, and jess works as a receptionist at a local hotel  opposite me.

we usually have the same lunch breaks so we either head into the diner next door, or we bring our home packed lunch with us, and sit by the lake at the nearby park, feeding the birds our left overs.

my job hours are pretty good, and since having every weekend off, i've been exploring la more and more, and i've already fallen in love with it here, more than i thought i would have. i used to hate my life, i would be in my room miserable, and crying all day everyday. i dropped out of school because i physically and mentally could not handle the pressure it gave me. my parents didn't care, and neither did my teachers. they were glad they didn't need to teach someone as depressed and lonely as me, they probably don't even remember my name if they saw it written anywhere for that matter.