coffee & cigarettes [j.v]

.001

Pictured above is Nic.

He was intoxicating from afar, ever since I saw him in the ninth grade I was hooked. His bright red hair and sharp jaw drew me in then, but now it was everything that defined him. 

Jerome Valeska. 

The only thing people knew about him was that he was apparently 'insane', couldn't be trusted. But I didn't see that. He was just alone, and because of that he would lash out. That was my theory at least. Sure he would often lash out at teachers and was known for shoving people around, but in my opinion they were all well deserved. Every story I heard about Jerome, was that he was always provoked. Who can blame him?

I stared at him intently, as I had for the last three years of high school. I always longed for September, seeing how he changed over the summer and what new features came about. I had a few classes with him this year which was a nice change - as just staring at him in the cafeteria was getting a bit old. 

He was sat at a table by himself, sipping only coffee and screwing around on his phone. I couldn't help but ache to go sit with him and talk to him, but I just couldn't handle the backlash I would get from everyone else for sitting with the crazy guy. I know I shouldn't care, but it was mostly my friend Jess that convinced me every time that it wasn't worth it. 

Speaking of Jess, I could hear her snickering at the table, obviously at me. She always teased me about my crush on Jerome, that I always stared for nothing - that he would never even give me a second look. 

I really only had Jess, so I just put up with her shit. Sometimes her other friends would sit with us at lunch from the cheer squad. Sometimes I think she was only friends with me because she felt bad. I never spent too much time thinking about it because I knew it would only spiral me into a hole of overthinking and I just didn't want to bother. 

I continued to stare at Jerome and watch all of his movements, the way he sipped coffee keeping his eyes on his phone as he scrolled through whatever feed he was on was just attractive. Hell, anything he did was attractive. 

I was ripped out of my thoughts by a pea smacking me in the face. I blinked rapidly and turned to the culprit  - Jess. 

"What do you want? Kinda busy here!" I snapped, always getting frustrated when she wouldn't shut up and just let me be a creep in peace. She laughed lightly, making me roll my eyes. I shot my eyebrows up, waiting for her reason for disrupting me.

"I asked you something?" She continued to giggle which just infuriated me more. I stayed silent, waiting for her to ask me again.

"Party? On Saturday? John asked me to ask you to come." She stated simply, wiggling her eyebrows at me. I groaned loudly and rolled me eyes. Mr. John fucking allstar just wanted to get in my pants. Ever since I actually grew into my body last summer he has been relentless. He thinks I can't see past his bullshit, but boy oh boy was he wrong. I knew what he was trying to do. It didn't help that Jess tells everyone that I'm a virgin, which gets all the guys fucking overly horny for some reason. 

"He just wants to try and fuck me. No way man." I simply stated, waving my hand at her, annoyed for even asking. She pouted her bottom lip and pressed her hands together in a 'pleaaaaseeeee' motion. 

"Come on Nic! Anthony is going and I really really think he's gonna ask me to be his girlfriend! Please Nic I can't go alone!" She scratched out, clearly trying to make me feel bad. Anthony was a guy she has been fucking all summer who won't commit to her. She is head over heels for this guy and I don't have the heart to tell her she's just an easy fuck for him. I rolled my eyes and decided to just shut up and deal with it for one night. 

"Fine. But you guys are not picking me up. I will gladly walk to wherever this party is instead of watching you two mouth fuck the entire way." I grunted out, already annoyed by the crowd of people I would have to deal with. Jess squealed in delight and clapped.

"That is fair! Thank you Nic! It means so much to me!" She was grinning wildly, making me groan. Ugh, anything that involved being in a crowd of my fellow peers made me want to puke. "The party is actually at the beach near your place! We're gonna have a fire and stuff after the football game!" She continued, making me groan more. I hated when people used that beach for parties. It was my favorite place in the whole world and they had to come ruin it all.

 "Okay is that all or can I continue to stare at the love of my life?" I simply asked. She put both of her hands up, telling me she was all done. I nodded and turned back to the table he was at, only to find it empty. I groaned in frustration and smacked my hands down. 

"Dammit Jess! Now he's gone! Now what am I going to do for the rest of lunch?" I asked, very grouchy with her in the moment. She laughed and threw her head back. 

"Maybe talk to me?" She continued to giggle through the words, which made me crack a smile. I guess I could do that too.