I gasped in shock as I felt a little hand rest on my face. Opening my eyes, I saw a familar face. Someone who I always thought was truly beautiful. My baby boy. I smiled at him...
He just tilted his head to look at me...his emotion unreadable, so unlike his father and me. I sat up in bed and asked him what was wrong.
He merely shrugged his shoulders before giving me a kiss on the cheek andwondering back to the living room. I hurridly threw on my robe and headed after him.
Had he been awake for long? I should have woke up sooner. I knew his father had to leave.
As I headed after him, I scolded myself for not being more responsible. I not only had myself to look after, but my beautiful baby boy also.
I walked into the living room to see his toys laying about...did I not clean up or had he been playing while I was asleep?
A frown appeared on my face....something seems off.
I looked around for my baby boy but couldn't find him...where did that three year old go now?
I headed to the kitchen, where I sometimes found him when he wanted something to eat. He would just stand there looking at the fridge and point to the food he wanted when I asked him, since he couldn't speak yet.
The bread was lying out on the counter and two jars of peanut butter...
Something was definately off....my son can't reach the counter yet.
I hurridly searched all the rooms to see that everything else was in place but the back door was left open. Slowly, I walked toward it.
No, no one would have taken my baby. Please, no.
With each step closer, my heart heavily thumped. Step. Thump. Step. Thump. Step. Thump.
My palms became sweaty and my mind raced...
I finally reached the door and looked outside....
A few toys laid about and I started to slightly panicked. It was winter and because of the very cold temperatures, I didn't allow my son to play outside.
I quickly dashed around the house in a frantic search of my son.
Where had he gone?
I quickly called 911 to report my son was missing. But they wouldn't listen so I dialed my husband. I told him what was going on and sobbed uncontrolably. He said he would be home shortly.
Upon arrival, I ran out to my husband. He had a slightly alarmed look on his face.
When I told him aout the un eaten sandwich and our son's toys laying about....his eyebrows pulled together....Why wasn't he worried? Going crazy looking for our son?
"Honey, what are you talking about?" He titled his head.
I pulled him to look at the sandwich and he just shrugged...I slightly panicked. I pulled him outside to our backyard to show him the toys...
But they weren't there. He pulled me inside and sat me down.
Carefully, he explained.
I had lost my baby ten years ago when I was fifteen years ago in an accident and that this was the exact date that it happened.
Memories flahsed and I remember saying goodbye to him one morning when he left to go with his grandpa....the feel of his soft little hand. When he kissed me on the cheek, his way of saying I love you. Then the cops explaining what happened and me sobbing in my husband's arms.
The tragic little funeral where my heart completely shattered.....
But i raised my head at my husband after thinking about it all....
"What about the peanut butter and bread?"
"That was his favorite thing to eat..." My husband tailed off.
No reasoning behind it on his eyes. But I do believe my baby came just to tell me he loved me.
Wow, this changed. I just typed it with an idea and thought it was going to be cute....
Written on July 11, 2014
