Stealing The Show (Such Sweet Sorrow Trilogy, Book One)

2

THE OTHER THING about Shoe is, he knows when to shut up. He drives me over to my dad's house without a word, and there's nothing to say anyway.  

By the time we get there, I have this theory going. It's not ready yet, but it's some idea about how love isn't all everybody says it is. Maybe everybody has it wrong and we're tricked into love so that we make babies and keep the species going. Maybe love is just an illusion. I don't know yet, it's just the beginnings of a theory. 

Shoe knows when to shut up but also when to talk. And he waits until we're sitting out in front of my dad's place to say anything. 

"Shit, man," he says. "That must've felt harsh, dude. But she didn't mean anything by it. She really likes you or she wouldn't spend so much time with you." 

"I'm like her goddamn teddy bear." I say.  

"At least you get to be around her, right?" Shoe hasn't turned down the radio and it's really loud still. He's obsessed with classic rock and it's playing "Radar Love." We both notice at the same time and laugh at it.  

Shoe starts singing. "Weeeee got a thing, that's called Zombie Love..." 

I glance over at my house and see that the light is on in the living room. This is very strange, because it's so late. Dad never waits up for me. But I don't feel like going inside yet. I'm not laughing hard enough at his singing so Shoe stops. 

"Lewis. Okay. You're going to shoot me." 

I look over at him. And he's staring at the dashboard like he can't make eye contact. This isn't like him. 

"What is it?" 

"I think she might be right," he says.  

"About...?"  

"I think maybe you need something. A thing. You're super smart and everything, but you don't do anything with it. Yet, I mean. I know you watch everybody else and come up with all these brilliant theories about us, but what about you?" 

Maybe it's because, yet again, I've failed to tell Jubilee Marshfield that I love her. I don't know. But I decide to prove to Shoe, to somebody at least, that I do have something.  

I'm a writer.  

I've never told anybody, but something about tonight just makes me say, "Dude. Can you come inside for a minute? I gotta show you something." 

He turns off the engine and flops out the door, no questions asked. Shoe was put on earth to be people's friend. And make people laugh. 

"What are you a zombie about, anyway?" I ask him and give him a shove as we're heading to the front door. 

He starts limping in a zombie walk with his arms out in front of him.  

"Blow Job!" he says.  

God, what timing the man has. I almost piss my pants.  

Which is good because I forget that I'm about to show him the book I'm writing with Paps. Nobody knows I do this except my grandfather and my dad. Why I'm showing Shoe, and why now, I have no theory. I just feels like I'm supposed to. 

But when I open the front door, we walk in to the living room with the light already on, and there is my dad and my grandfather. They're in their usual spots, my dad on the couch, and Paps in the La-Z-Boy.  

They're drinking champagne, which is extremely strange. They're smiling but it looks sad. They both look completely exhausted. But they pretend to be happy to see us when we walk into the room.