Personally 2 [Complete]

Chapter 6: Shouldn't I Be Worried

She refuses to talk to me. I blame her. She's the reason all of this is happening in the first place. She hurt her own self the moment she got involved with him. She's to blame but damn! Why am I hurting too? I need Janet. No, no. It's late. I can't do that she has a busy schedule tomorrow.

"Hello, Janet? You didn't pick up your phone. It's old fashioned, but I'm leaving a voicemail...call back, okay? ...My mom hasn't come home yet and I'm-I'm worried...bye."

I stood in the kitchen with my cell phone as my only source of light. I had just washed the dishes, mainly because I wanted too, and partly because I had hoped my mother would see it. Pretty typical of her to not show up. I'm used to her not being around at night. But the few moments that she did spend the night home, made all the difference. We often said nothing to each other, but I considered it as a sort of motherly-son bond because I knew she was there and she knew that I was too. We acknowledge our dysfunctional family through silence, it's a solemn communication that only we two understand. Maybe that wasn't enough for her. It's enough for me. There's no point in staring at my phone anymore. Janet isn't going to call back.

***

Today's tutoring session felt more like a lecture on everything I didn't want to hear about. Veronica was complaining about how underdressed she was the other day and how I should be more considerate and tell her. How can she still be on that? At least she isn't bringing up the grand climax of it all. She's too focused on herself.

"-and that is why giving heads up is always a good idea, you got that?"

"Got it," I reply.

"...so that party your ex invited you to, you going?" She fiddled with her green mechanical pencil, slowly swinging it back and forth.

"Would you?" I looked at her plainly.

"In this circumstance, yes, I would."

I didn't bother asking what she meant. "I know you're new and everything, but it won't be that shocking to them that I decided not to go. It isn't the first time I've declined an offer."

"It's more than just going or not." She placed down the pencil. "You obviously have something against your mother's fiance -wait, hear me out before you say anything. I know it's none of my business and that I probably shouldn't say anything, but you will need their help."

"You know what's annoying about people? You say 'I shouldn't have said it', but then say it anyway."

"I'm trying to help." She insisted.

"No, thanks. I've got it under control"

"What? That's what you call under control? Just give me a chance. I can help you, seriously."

"Just lay off Veronica."

"Hye, I need to do this...I failed the first time and I can't let it happen again...My mom remarried too. I told her the guy was with was a jerk but I couldn't make her see it. They're always so blind, and now she's a wreck."

"Sorry about your mom."

"And I don't want you to be sorry about yours."

I was a bit grateful when I heard the door open and the sound of heels tap against the floor. The conversation was getting too weird. Janet saves the day. She already called back this morning, but I didn't say any of the things that I wanted to say to her last night. I don't think I ever will.

***

"So, you're going after all?" Her expression was unconvinced.

"Yeah." I glanced at Veronica who was quiet and slightly on edge. "I, uhmm, think Ms. Abreau deserves to be appreciated."

"...right..." She studies me thoroughly. "Well, I just wanted to stop by and say hi. I guess I'll see you at the party, tomorrow?" She sounded more like she was asking herself.

After Janet went through the front door. Veronica and I eased up. "Phew, I thought you would give me away. She can't know about what we talked about, okay?" She said.

"I don't see why not, but sure. You better not make me regret this."

"Oh you won't, trust me. From now on no more crappy plans. I make the plans now." She smiled almost too confidently for my liking. "What are you looking at?" She asked. "Let's get back to work."

Shouldn't I be worried?