14 y/o you

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Turning 14 was just another year getting close to death. My life isn't terrible, but there isn't any thrill to that makes me want to live. I've been single all my life and I'm scared to approach boys.

"What does he think of me?"
"Do I look pretty in his eyes?"
"Is he thinking about me?"
"Does he think I'm fat?"
"Is he single?"

Those are the main reasons as if to why I'm still single.

I guess there are more guys out there for me?

Anyways, it wasn't till a few days after my birthday when I had this really weird, scary, and funny dream. There was guy who looked around my age, but I couldn't point out if I had saw him somewhere. He just looked so real in my head to the point where I didn't even think I had this good of an imagination.

The dream started with me in a cold, dark, small room with a dim light bulb hanging above me, while I was seated in a black chair. There was also a mirror with everything it could copy, but something was off. There was a door in the mirror, but no door behind me. I got up and stood in front of the mirror and stuck my hand out to see if I could open the door. I was right, I could open it. I turned the knob and pushed the door open to see a boy. He's studying and I look at the clock and see its 2am. What an overachiever.

He was a skinny boy and I figured he cared about his education more than his health. It was a weird assumption, but that's what popped in my head.

It was almost like I was there with him, but he didn't seem to notice my presence. I was trying to figure out what he was learning, but I couldn't read it.

There came a point where he just got frustrated and started to cry. He was complaining in what I had thought that sounded like gibberish. Definitely wasn't English.

He stopped whimpering and said something that I could understand.

"I need to get some sleep."

I would think he would have some sort of accent when saying that, but he didn't.

He turned off the lights and tucked himself in his bed.  It wasn't till a few minutes later in my dream when he actually looked at me. I walked over to his bed and sat there as his eyes followed me.

He asked if I was a ghost and I told him no.

There was some sorta blur when I realized that I was under his covers laughing about something.

"How were we communicating?"

I got on top of him and straddled both my legs on his hips. It felt a bit too real that I could actually feel something getting hard in between my legs.

"Was I in some guys..... wet dream?"

I started to move my hips back and forth without knowing why. I got the urge to ask for his name during that weird moment.

"Namjoon, Kim Namjoon."

I was confused. I didn't know if he was telling me his name or saying something in his language. I tried to repeat back after him, but it sounded so off.

"Nahmjuun?," is what I asked.

He chuckled.

"My name is Kim Namjoon"

"So......Kim?"

"That's basically my family's name, but my actual name is Namjoon."

"Oh?"

He asked for my name and I told him.

For the first time, I felt loved and it was in my dream. I could actually talk to a real boy. *that's not Pinocchio*

He was talking to me about school and how stressful it was. I was going to talk about my school experience, but I woke up when my alarm  sounded.

I woke up wondering...

"What the hell did I just dream of?"

I told my friends about it when I went to school, and they wanted to know what he looked like?

I told them that it was a dream and that I can't really show them, but they wanted a description.

In my head I saw...

I didn't want to make fun of him when describing him, so I changed topics

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I didn't want to make fun of him when describing him, so I changed topics.

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