Hi there, human..
For your information, I am sitting in the corner of an empty room... all of this, my words, my feelings, my thoughts and I are hallucinations. IAMINFECTEDBYLIFE.
I love to think of myself sitting by the ocean, where it is raining and everything is blue... I try to take a peek on what's on my left and find nothing but the hill and the water.. really nothing else.. and so I find the same thing on my right.
My mind is really shut, hallucinating about everyrhing that comes from nothing -seek and you should find what I mean-
I am wearing white dress, nothing special.. bare-footed, and for once in my life, I am dancing, happily, no one is there.
It is like a verbal conversation with my soul, I have a special meeting with my evil and guess what? He will dance with me, my evil takes me by my left, and the good angel by my right... that'd prove that I am not controlling myself, even now, I am not. Words are floating in my head and I have a net that helps me to catch them... yes, I am a hunter.. the good kind.
Then the music goes down, my angel and evil start to fade, they fly away deciding that I am not good enough, nor bad enough... that I am never ENOUGH for anyone... for anything.
Then I fell down, taking the fetus position... arms hugging feet... I am HUGGING myself.
Sobbing..
Then the heaviness is somehow lifted up from me, more important from my soul. So I head to stand up, my eyes are closed, my mind is shut, my tears are dried, and my soul is broken. I am walking fast and slow, then... I stand by the ocean, and that little of heaviness that is still inside me pushes me to the water....
I keep drowning, I don't even try to fight it. I rest myself in peace.
Music inspiration: Max Richter- on the nature of daylight.
