Chapter One.

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I woke up feeling a little bit groggy after last nights homecoming party, the sound of my dad's voice screaming happy birthday already gave me a head ache. Which made me remember that today was my birthday; august 6, 2018, I turned 18. And I'm already half way through of my life realizing that nothing can ever change the fact that I'm once again celebrating my birthday without my brother.

My dad, my step-mother; legally of course, and my Step-Sister altogether sang the happy birthday song in front of me. Dad held up a simple birthday cake and gave me a wink. Mom on the other hand sang with a blissful smile. My sister jumped into a bed trying to maintain her composure as he hand me a gift bag.

"happy birthday MJ!" Little Shelly said. She's the cutest thing ever. wearing a pink patterned pajamas while her hair was still messy. "Happy birthday MJ!" Dad followed. "Go ahead sweetie, open it up." Emily ordered. I gave them a joyful smirk before I unwrap my gift. Of course, it was a journal and a stencil set. "Oh my goodness! You guys! This is- ugh! This is amazing." It was all I wanted since I always like to write about stuff. "Thank you so much you guys! " I got up and hugged them, dad leaned forward and positioned the cake to his side so I could hug him. "I love you both" I said.

"We love you too sweetie." Emily said, caressing my cheeks. 

"And happy 18th birthday!"  Dad added. 

I signaled Shelly to come over. I kneeled down to her. "Thank you sweet heart, how about we buy you some air heads later before I bring you to school." She bit her lip and nodded. "Well, be better get going, and this cake isn't gonna finish itself." 

I picked up my gift from the floor, dad entered again and asked me a favour. "Hey MJ?" He entered my room again and closed the door. "Hey dad, what's wrong?" I just had to ask. He looked right through me and gave me a concerned look. "Are you sure?" He asked again. I released a sigh before I slammed myself back to bed.

"Hey..." he sat down and grabbed my hand. "I know this is another hard day for you. But you have to find a way to be happy, you turned 18, it's a thing right? For girls? To turn 18? It's something special." He said. Thought started to run through my head again, bad ones.

"I know dad, it's just that... " I paused, not knowing what I was going to say. Dad kept his eyes locked at me. "You know what? forget it." I told dad as I stood up.

"What is it that's bothering you?" He asked. I'm such a terrible liar, I cant even deny myself for one bit. I never keep a secret, not to my parents or any of my friends. And I wish I could, because the more I try to deny the truth, the more that I realize that everything is just real. "Dad, I know he's still alive, I know that he's there somewhere-" Then dad instantly had enough. He quickly grabbed my arms as he try to bring me back into reality.

"MJ, Peter is dead. Your brother is dead and you know that. He's not lost MJ, he's dead." And I wish I was too. I found myself looking down to the floor, frustrated and embarrassed. Its been years since my brother left us, and I'm still falling for the same loop that I told to myself that my brother is just missing. It took two whole weeks before they told us that they found Peter's body under a bridge near our town. I stayed at home when my parents went to the authorities, and the only evidence I saw is a dead picture of my 'brother', his face mutilated, and stabbed six times. I couldn't even look at it. But I'm sure that the boy in the picture wasn't peter.

Everyday, for the rest of my living days, I wake up and try to live up to my brothers gruesome murder. And up to this day, as I celebrate my 18th birthday? he's all I could think off.

I went downstairs to get a late breakfast after my quick shower, I had no time to dress up so I just made myself comfortable with jeans and a hoodie. It is currently eight-thirty in the morning and I have to get to school by 12. I always despise myself for not being a morning person. I took an afternoon schedule because I just can't wake up properly during the mornings.

"A stack of pancakes just for the birthday girl." Emily said, she have her brown curly hair tied up into a bun as she began to stack some pancakes on my plate.

"Since when do we eat breakfast?" I sarcastically asked, followed by a sip on my orange juice. "Since you turned eighteen." She replied, bringing the plate to the dining table. "Oh? okay, is it because I'm to skinny or you just want me to become more fatter?" I sat down and grabbed a spoon of sugar and add it to my juice. "more fatter is a double negative honey, and besides you need to step up your A game if you want to join the swim team." She said. I always loved to swim. It always feels like I'm invisible when I'm under water.

"You're an athlete?" Little Shelly asked while stuffing her mouth with her pancakes.

"No Shelley I am not. And don't talk while you're mouth is full." Shelly on the other hand, didn't take it too well. She adorably spat her food so she could talk. "Oops, I'm sorry." She smiled. Dad entered the kitchen and quietly sat down beside me. I grabbed his hands and mumbled; "I'm sorry." He mouthed; "It's okay." after wards before Emily joined us.

Breakfast was okay. I really never got used to the whole family talk. I've started to avoid family conversations ever since my mom died. I could use a fresh start however, it's not like everyday I get to turn eighteen. I always motivate my self to do more, rather than just slapping myself on how unlucky my life turned out to be. I picked myself up, grabbed my bagged, adjusted my clothes and grabbed my little Sister Shelly to have a little walk to school.

After bidding our goodbyes, I took Shelly's little hands and opened the door, only to find a a boy. Standing firm while holding a fruit basket wrapped in cellophane. My jaw dropped instantly while I gaze through his facial structures. His dirty blonde hair, deep green eyes, and his incredibly attractive lips.

I zoned out for a second before I went back to reality. "Uh- Excuse me, I brought sustenance." lifting up the fruit basket .Then he smiled, showing off his dimples.

But why? Why does he look and sound so new. Like a prince charming straight out off a fairy tale novel but at the same time, like I'm looking at someone that I knew before.

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⏰ Last updated: Jul 31, 2018 ⏰

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