Stars-Newt TMR DISCONTINUED

Chapter 2

A/N: Trigger warning for this chapter. Anywho this chapter is one trigger warning. I urge you all ,if you have any problems, to come to me. I might not have brilliant advice but I can be your shoulder to cry on even if I don't know you in real life. I'm not forcing you to say anything but just if you want to. TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ I don't want any rude comments saying 'you didn't warn us' and all that crap cos this is my longest A/N like ever so those of you with a rod stuck up your arse, fuck off and grow up. Love you all 😘!
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The bloody maze
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After walking away from a snickering Nick and Newt I explored the unmissable large walls keeping us trapped in here. There was a massive entrance in the middle of all 4 walls that lead to an equally large corridor. "That love, is the maze, that's what we call it anyway, it is the same as it's name, a large maze. Pretty unsolvable so far but it is the only way out that we can see." Brilliant we are trapped in a massive unsolvable maze. Just fan-fucking-tastic!

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Gally and I got a tour around the 'glade' as they called it from Nick, apparently he was the second person here, after Alby and people have been coming up alone once a month, me and my little Gal-Pal were the only ones who came up together.

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I never want to admit this ever again but I'm scared, and angry, but mostly scared. I mean I'm trapped in the middle of a giant maze, what is apparently unsolvable so far, with a bunch of boys! Of coarse I'm scared.

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A year later
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It's been a whole fucking year. Yea yea I know 'I'm meant to use the slang' but honestly if we are going to express our feeling we should do it correctly so I am allowed to swear.
Newts lost hope. My rock is unstable. He is collapsing, straining under the weight of lives he isn't living and burdens he was carrying that aren't his. I'm scared for him. He has become distant. Angry. Snapping at me with every chance he has. Started swearing. Going of into the deadheads alone. Hopefully this idea Nick has will bring the light back into his eyes again. I rely on him so much. We all do. He runs off into the maze every day. Comes back late and hasn't tracked his entire section. I can't do anything about it. I'm a med-jack. Always refuses help even with the bandages on his wrists. I'm scared for him. No one else seems to notice. Guess I just pay attention. I care. A lot! To much. Newt says that at least. Tells me not to worry. He's fine. Even if he is, I'm not. Not without him at least. I don't want this cold, cut off Newt.

I hate them. I hate the creators. They put us in this place. They broke my Newt. They hurt me and him not externally but internally. Not physically but mentally. When I get out of this place they are going to get it!!!

It's been a month since Newt started acting weird and he blew up on me

Flashback a week ago (about a week ago)

My trip to the homestead seemed to last forever. I'm going to confront him. As I said, it took ages to get there. I'm walking slow, slower than normal, the constant fear of seeing something I didn't want to in Newts room, like him self-harming or masturbating BRRR freaky and that image is now in my brain forever.
I knocked on his door before opening in fully to reveal a Newt lying on the floor, face down, like he collapsed. But more concerning, blood literally everywhere, but the main source was his wrist.
"What the fuck are you doing here Bobbie?!?!" And boy was he angry. I notice he had sat up and started wrapping his wrists up in gauge like it was nothing. It scared me how casual he acted. Like he had don't it before a million times, and how sloppy he was wrapping his wrists, it could get infected!
"I asked you a question did you not hear it." His tone was sharp like a blade. I cleared my throat before talking in such a quiet voice it was barely heard by myself let alone Newt, "what happened to you Newt? You lost hope. You gave up on everything, a life here, friends, a home. A home isn't a place it's a person. I've just lost my home!" I don't  know where the confidence came from but all I know it was contagious because I was no longer just standing in the middle of the room, I was now pinned against the wall with a livd Newt in my face. With spit flying in my face he growled "Of course you say home is a person don't you. You rely on people to much. What exactly are you capable of doing yourself?? Nothing! You are so reliant on other people! You need me. And you only realise that now I'm gone. Your too late for your 'home' speech! I'm lost. I have no one to call home. Besides I'm not as reliant on others as you are!"

Present time

I never thought those words would ever come out his mouth. I haven't left my room since then. Barely eating. Or doing anything except cry. Because Newt is right. I'm so reliant on others. I'm just a burden. I should just go. Go into the maze at night. Stay there and die. Everyone would like that. I would be considered 'Bobbie the suicidal' instead of 'Bobbie the freak' or 'Bobbie the fan-fucking-tastic friend that has drove their best friend to depression because she was to reliant'

I hate the glade. It's no longer Home, not without Newt!