Divergent High School

s i x : nobody can get close to me, ever

FOUR POV:

   I'm laying in the middle of the bed, and she rests on the side of it. "Alright, Four, this is going to sting. You can hold my hand if you want." she says. I shrug, and she lays her hand next to mine, I guess, in case I change my mind. She grabs a dropper that has a liquid in it, and begins to drop it all over my back. I scream into my pillow, lacing my fingers in hers. I squeeze it, and she squeezes back, but gently, and continues with the dropper.

She rubs small circles on my hand, and it relieves me some, but not much. "Okay, this should make it feel better in a few seconds." she grabs a wipe of some sort, and rubs it on my back. It is sore at first, but then makes me feel relaxed, like I can move again. She flips me over, and nothing hurts right now. "Is that better?" she asks, smoothing my hair out of my face.

It's like I forget how to talk, move or breathe. The way she looks down at me, and the way her fingers slide across my skin, makes me feel different. I've never felt like this for a girl before.

She's not just a girl. She's not like the other girls. She's different, and though imperfect, she's completely perfect to me.

She has flaws, but embraces them, instead of worrying about them. I like her. A lot. I think I've truly fell in love.

"Four? Are you alright?" she says, panic rising in her voice, and I realize that I never answered her question. "Um, sorry. Yeah, I'm fine now. And...about what---happened..." I say, and she continues to smooth my hair out. I don't stop her, because I like the feeling of her skin on mine, but in a good way.

"Shh. We can talk about it later. Right now, you just need to sleep." she says, and her voice is quiet and low, and almost sends me to sleep. "O---kay." I say in between yawn. I close my eyes, and she continues to stroke my hair. I try to sleep, but my eyes flutter open. "Tris, I can't sleep." I say. She stands up, and walks over to my bedroom door, and turns the light off, then she turns the lamp on, giving us a small amount of light.

"Tris?" I question. I start to sit up, but she presses me back down. "Just try to sleep, Four. You'll start hurting again soon, and if you can doze a bit, you might can sleep it off." she says, and I shake my head. I sit up, and rest against the head board of the bed, and she sits next to me, legs crossed. She looks at me, hoping for an explanation. "It's just...if Mar---my dad--comes back, he'll see you and you'll get in trouble." I say, and she looks at me weird.

"Why would I be in trouble?" she asks. I take a big breath. "I didn't want to have to tell you this, but uh, my dad is---Marcus. The principal at school." I say, and she nods. "And if he finds you here, he'll tell your father, and you'll be in trouble for being here with me." I say. "No, he knows I'm here." she says, and I nod in understanding.

We don't talk for a while, I just stare down at my sheets, and she plays with her fingers. After a while, I speak up. "Tris?" I say. "Yes?" she asks, looking up at me, and immediately stops fidgeting.

"Why did you come to see me?" I ask. "Oh, well... My parents found out I am Dauntless, and they weren't mad, so I came to thank you." she says. "For what?" I ask. "The help. Advice. I figured I you'd be useful for something at some point." she says, and elbows me playfully, while smiling. I smile, a large smile, and I feel really happy. I love to see her happy.

"I'm glad to see you smile..." she says, and looks down. "Yeah...I don't very much these days." I say, and she looks up at me, her light blue eyes shimmering. "Why don't you?" she asks, quietly. "Well, it's about my dad... and my mom..." I say, and she blurts as soon as I finish talking. "What ever happened to your mom?" she says, but immediately covers her face with her hands. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to push. I shouldn't have asked..." she says, and stands, walking towards the door.

"No, Tris...don't leave." I say, and I sound unsure of myself. I stand up, walking towards her, grabbing her elbow. "Don't." I say, firmer, and look her in the eyes.

"Why? I just messed everything up..." she says, running a frustrated hand through her hair. I shake my head. "No, Tris. It's fine. I understand that you're curious because I never told everyone what happened. I'd be happy to tell you about her." I say, giving a small smile.

She nods, wanting me to continue, and I take her hand. Not in a romantic way, but I pull her to the bed with me, and sit down, crossing my legs. She sits in front of me, her legs crossed as well. She rests her hands in her lap, giving me her full attention.

"So...my mom was a great mother. Me and her did everything together, and I think Marcus got upset with her. She and I always thought he was jealous, because he started--he started..." I say, but I can't say the words. Abusing us. I've never said the words out loud before, only in my head.

"It's okay, Four. You can tell me. You can trust me, I promise." she says, and I nod. She takes my big hands in her small ones, and looks up, giving me a reassuring smile.

"He started...abusing us." I say, and my voice sounds almost breathless. I wait for her to gasp, but she doesn't. She squeezes my hand. "Go on." she says, her voice sounding strained. "And then, shortly after, my mom was in a car accident, on the way home from work one day. The police called our house, and Marcus wasn't home. I had to answer the phone as a 6 year old, and find out that my mother was in a wreck, all alone..." I say, and I look down.

I look back up. "I told them that my daddy wasn't home from work yet, and I tried to stifle the tears. They ended the call, called him, and he came home and picked me up. We rode to the hospital, and she was there, in the worst condition I had ever seen her. Worse than after Marcus beat her. And then the line went dead after we had been there for only 5 minutes."

"She was gone. Her funeral was the next day, and Marcus wasn't even sad. I almost cried, but managed to keep the tears back until we got home that night. Marcus started beating me even more, sometimes a few times a day. The first time it was the worst, was the night after her funeral. I was in my room, crying, trying to ignore everything that reminded me of her."

"I'm so sorry, Four..." she says, and I keep my eyes averted. I don't want to see her look at me in pity. I can't stand it when people do that.

She removes one hand from mine. Good job Four. Now, she doesn't want anything to do with you, because you are some abused and kicked puppy! I think, but I'm wrong. She reaches up, taking my face in her soft hand, and she tilts my head up to look at her. "He started beating me worse, since I was apparently being a weakling about her death. That's why I became a Dauntless." I say, and her face contorts in confusion. I stand up, to get away from her. She can't see anymore of my weakness.

I walk to the door. "Four?" she asks. "I couldn't be seen as weak, because people would find out what he did to me. I had to become strong, and now I have. And nobody, nobody, can get close to me. Ever. " I say. I rest my head on the door, and bang my fist on the door. Over, and over, ignoring the searing pain that passes through my split knuckles. Again, and again, my hands compound in a punch against the door. I don't know how long it is before Tris comes to stop me, but she eventually does.

just me or is four goin crazy...jk, he's just rough when it comes to talking about his mom, since he misses her so much!! (single tear) also, he finally told tris about marcus's beatings etc:( but yeah, hope y'all enjoyed, and here's fact number two:

2. I love heights, i'm just trying to conquer my fear of falling from them!!
(i just did a huge zip line recently that had a 300 foot drop with a big waterfall at the bottom, and a open view of the mountains....IT WAS AMAZING AND BEAUTIFUL!!

(so four and i are sorta similar!!🤪)