Jodie

Omega

      I woke up to yelling and screaming. To my surprise it wasn't my Dad freaking out because of a hangover, or him noticing that he threw up on the couch. I woke up to DHS coming in my house with the police tackling my Dad and handcuffing him. "Don't worry baby, he isn't going to hurt you or Aaron as long as I'm around" says Patsy. At first I was (Yes yes yes yes!!) but then I saw the look Dad gave me, he gave me this look like he was sorry for everything. I felt so awful even when Aunt Patty was thanking me for telling her.

     The DHS has sat me down in the kitchen dining table and the handed me a piece of paper. "What is this? I don't understand why there is only a yes or no box." Patsy replies back, "You can either live with me or you can live here on your own with government money, me helping and your job; but you need to talk to Aaron." I didn't know what to think, how could keep Aaron from living somewhere with an actual role model besides me, but if I do go to live with her I'm out in a few months. I sat down with Aaron, "You're gonna choose, I is unfair for me to make any choice." Aaron was okay with that and so he went in there, explained everything and chose to stay with Aunt Patty.

      As I'm now packing my things, I knocked my journal off the nightstand next to my bed and it flips to a page that I kept my regrets and prayed over them. I scrolled down and saw "Stealing those earrings, threw Aaron down the stairs, calling that ginger girl with one arm No Soul Surfer", but tears filled my eyes because I involuntarily grabbed my pen and wrote "Losing Faith". I lost faith that God would protect me, Dad never do anything that bad, yes he beat me but it was a slap. I loved my Dad but I broke under the rage and pain I bottled up for so long. I fell to my knees praying to God "I'm not asking for him back, but please let him come to you through this. I didn't do the job you called me to do, or maybe I did but I don't know. Just please help me from here on out, to use my testimony to help others with the same problem as I had... Amen."

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     I'm now living with my Aunt, I'm with a new youth group,  and now I'm doing what I'm called to do. Don't let hardships keep you from doing what you're called to do. Sure you are going to want to chunk the Bible at a wall because you don't feel God there. Just remember that He didn't send his Son to die just to leave you with un-answered questions.

:) Love,

                Jodie