Deceit's Hunger

Part 12

Deceit could feel himself wilting under Patton's intimidating stare, he's only about an inch shorter than him and yet Patton seems to own that height in every way that he fears. As of yet, the moral side hasn't even said anything, but just the way that his hands remain on his shoulders and just the way that he continues to stare at him. He feels like he needs to make himself smaller, he feels that like a field mouse he needs to scurry away and hide in some hole until the danger has passed.

Except he can't do that, Patton's grip is something that he feels frozen in, he feels almost like a kitten that's being held up by the scruff of its neck by its parents. Or maybe a hawk that's come to kill and devour him, given what happened last time he and Patton were alone together.

His chest feels like its burning, how long had he been holding his breath again? Why was his vision so misty?

"Deceit." Patton began, and the side in question felt his like his knees had turned to jello, and not the good kind, not the kind that he felt when Thomas talked to his crush. But the kind that could be felt when facing something or someone that made him fear for his life, by all accounts Patton seemed to be harmless but Deceit knew...he knew Patton, and how terrifying he could really be if he wanted to.

"Deceit listen, I..look I said some things in the kitchen, and I didn't know. I..I didn't know..." That Roman and Logan would react this way. Was clearly left unsaid, but it was obvious enough to Deceit, he could see right through the moral side, he could see right through his apology without even having to look at him with his snake eyes.

So attempted to squirm a little in the other's grip, his room wasn't too far away, Patton would stop him from sinking out but if he could distract him or in the very least break his hold on him, then perhaps he could get enough of a headstart to make it to his room.

And never leave there again.

He shook the thought away now wasn't the time for thoughts like that, as he squirmed again in Patton's grip testing to see just how hard to he was going to try and keep him there. Maybe he could accept the apology and just be on his way, would his mouth even get the words out though? It felt like his lips were sewn shut, like the words he needed to get out where all a garbled mess in the back of his throat.

His back thumped against the wall, and that's when he felt it.

His lungs were crushing him, why? Why? Why? Why? He was trapped now. Cornered like he had been in the kitchen. There was no escape, was there? He was standing before him, he was blocking his path. Why? Why? Why? Deceit was being bad, he wasn't trying to hurt anyone. Why? Why couldn't he just..why couldn't he just live with the others and be happy. Like Virgil. He had never done this Virgil. So why was he so different? Why was he the one that needed to be terrified, to be hurt, and to be starved before everyone else was happy?

Why?

A strangled whimper left Deceit's lips as his vision started to tunnel, and just like that he was sinking down in the spiral of his own thoughts, with his back sliding against the wall before he landed on the floor with a gentle but sudden thump.

Patton jerked his hands away from Deceit at the sound that left the deceitful side's lips, his plan had been simple really. Apologize to Deceit, and make up everything that had happened to him so that Deceit and all of the others could truly know how sorry he was. This..this was not apart of the plan, Deceit sitting with his back against the wall, and his arms curled up around his head like a barrier was NOT apart of the plan.

No...he hadn't meant to hurt him again, he had just wanted to apologize!

"Deceit..." He attempted to reach forward towards the huddled up side.

Just to watch as Deceit flinched back from him, a crushing sensation of pain descended upon his heart. He never wanted anybody to get hurt, he never wanted...this.

There was a painful lump in his throat as he caught just the tiniest glimpse of Deceit's snake eyes through the gape in his arms, he wasn't looking at anything... It was like he was seeing nothing and yet everything all at once and really Patton had no idea to help him. How was he supposed to help with something that he had caused? How was he supposed to help heal someone that he had wounded?

Kneeling down on the carpeted floor Patton didn't attempt to touch Deceit again, he had no doubt that doing so would only cause more harm than good either way. Eventually the kneeling hurt his knees, so he ended up sitting right in front of the deceitful side a pained but sorrowful expression on his face.

"Deceit..." He began, his fingers itched to touch the other, to lay his hand on the other's shoulder in a comforting fashion and to let him know that he was safe. However, he had to accept that doing so wouldn't help, that this time..this time he couldn't just could hug away other people's issues. With some things, just talking could help, even if it would take a while.

"Deceit, you..you did nothing wrong kiddo..." He tried again, clearing his throat as his voice cracked a little, he needed to carry on regardless of how many times his voice tried to give out. "What I said...what I did to you wasn't right. No matter the reasons I did it, even if I was trying to protect the others..you..you didn't deserve that. You didn't deserve to be threatened and to be hurt by me under the threat of violence. You..you deserved to be treated with kindness, and I..I am so sorry kiddo. I am so sorry."

The tears that Patton had tried to keep at bay finally spilled over, and a thick wet hiccup left him as he tilted his head down. His messy brown hair flopped in his face as he clasped his hand down over his face, and even as he heard the footsteps coming up the stairs in a rushed and hurried manner. Patton didn't move.

Whatever happened, would happen because he deserved it.

The moment that Logan had told him Virgil shoved himself away from the table and ran up the stairs. He didn't want to believe it and for just about half a second he didn't, that was until he realized...it made sense.

God it made sense, Deceit has shown absolutely no fear when being taken care of Logan, and he had happily eaten the food that Roman had made for him. Deceit even talked about the dark sides without an issue, it was only..it was only when Patton was brought up in the conversation that Deceit had reacted.

How could I have been so stupid? I brought it up without even thinking!

Guilt gnawed at his insides with a vicious integrity as he climbed the steps of the stairs, it felt like a climb up Mount Everest as his lungs were heaving. Of course, Deceit didn't tell him, let alone Logan until now. Patton was..Patton had been the one person who had treated him nicely in his 'villain days', but now...

Now, look at him.

The nasty thought bubbled up out of nowhere and it took a surprising amount of effort to push it away as he made it to the top step. Not now, Deceit needed to know, Virgil needed to let him know.

The path to Deceit's room was one that he had memorized, from endless nights of going to check up on the deceitful side in order to make sure that he was still alive and breathing. Of just sitting in that cushioned seat and watching him until his own eyes dropped with exhaustion. This time, this time the path was blocked by a familiar set of figures.

Almost immediately Virgil felt the eyeshadow under his eyes grow darker and darker, the burning hot sensation of rage felt scorching under his skin, as he opened his mouth, a snarl of words coming out. Anger bubbled inside of his stomach like an acidic mixture of poisons until he finally let it all out in one enraged shout. His voice was booming, and it certainly could be heard down the hall as well as downstairs. But he could care less, as his dark eyes locked onto the bunched up figure of Deceit on the floor.

"What have you done to him?!"