Jealousy [RIREN]

chapter twenty- guilt

(Levi's p.o.v)

Erens weak fists hit my chest lightly, tears still pouring down his cheeks as he lay there... I didn't know how to react. This was all caused by me but... I couldn't move.
"C-Captain... P-please just leave me..." His feet hit my shoulders as he forcefully kicked me from the bed, hitting the cold stone floor with a heavy thud. "I never want to see you again. This wasn't right, I didn't consent to this..."
"Eren I'm so sor-"
"Go! Get out!" I did as he said and left. Where was I gonna go now? I was so obsessed with Eren that I forgot how I used to live. My bedroom had been contaminated by the memories of our nights together; my office had been overtaken with his scent and the hallways seemed so lonely when I wasn't being followed by that puppy eyed brat. Life had lost meaning...

(Erens p.o.v)

Almost a whole week had passed since that incident, allowing me to come to terms with what had happened and how I was gonna cope with it. However, something had changed and everyone was starting to notice: the captain had completely vanished.
"Eren!" Erwin jogged towards me, his brows furrowed. "Levi's gone missing. He's not in his room or his office and everyone has started to panic."
"What's so good about him anyway?!" Snarling as I thought of his stupid face, I attempted to leave the conversation.
"He's humanities strongest," Erwin wrapped his hand firmly around my arm, pulling me back to growl at me under his breath. "We need him. You need him. Everyone needs him." As much as hated what he did to me, there were many other people who desperately needed his help.
"I'm not going to forgive him," I snapped back, yanking my arm away from Erwin as hard as I could. "But I'll get him back. Don't worry." He shouldn't have wandered very far, at least on the castle grounds. "Captain?!" Called out into the darkness surrounding me. Nothing. "Captain Levi?!" Then, through the the trees and bushes, something peaked out stained red and purple. Three unconscious men. Three unbelievably familiar men. Three men I hated deeply were just laying there completely still, resembling corpses. I wanted to see if they were okay; I wished I saw them suffering at the hands of whoever or whatever did this. "Captain! Please come back!" I didn't understand. Why didn't he just answer? Suddenly, a hand grasped my ankle as I attempted to pass the bastards on the ground, holding me in place.
"P...Please..." He choked violently, coughing up a disgusting concoction of saliva and blood. "Help... Me..." Snarling down at him, devoid of pity, I swung my foot back only to bring it down with as much force I could muster, hoping to break a couple of ribs as I kicked him. He started gagging.
"I'm only out here for the Captain, not scum like you."
"You seem lively," his monotone voice whispered calmly from the darkness, "I thought you didn't want to see me. Was that a lie?" It wasn't a lie but... It wasn't the truth either. The reason I didn't want to see him was... guilt. While Captain fucked me as I slept, the dream I was having made me feel like I wasn't being loyal to him... Even if it's only the work of my subconscious, it still felt like cheating.
"I'm sorry... It's only partly your fault..." Wiping away tears, I stifled a sob. "Captain Levi, I didn't mean it... It wasn't my fault... I think..."
"What happened Eren?" Levi stayed far away from me, the gap between us caused my heart to ache.
"You can't get mad when I tell you okay?! It was just a dream!"
"I'm willing to listen." He answered calmly, leaning casually against the thick tree trunk.