The Love Of This World

my faith won💪🏻

'Faith or love?' My heart asked. I replied 'faith (islam)'. 'Why?' It questioned. I simply replied, 'because there is no replacement. Everything and everyone is replaced by something and someone better but there is no replacement for my "Rabb"'. My heart ached, it ached and it still aches because it is conscious about the consequences. My mind retorted....scolded my heart for placing such a thought. There were mixed feelings that was unwilling to leave even though the door was wide open. 'Why?' My mind continued. My heart replied, 'because i am attached'. My heart failed to console itself and it knew that the words uttered by it were wrong which caused immense pain that i sensed it. I wanted to weep. My inner soul woke up, tried to soothe me saying, 'ya Swaliha, someone better,  something better awaits. God has plans and the best ones are for you. Your lord will never disappoint you ever because He loves you. How much does your mother love you? if at all she does. To infinity and beyond, so imagine how much god loves you who is the creator of your kin, your mother. Do you think Allah will harm you? Never. These are your desires speaking which is normal and not eternal. Shut them off orelse a menace awaits. God has a plan and all you are asked is to 'believe'. BELIEVE in the truth, for no individual can escape death. One of the realities of life. Cling on to your faith. Choose your faith over everything which will conquer your fears. Bring about joy and tranquility.  Trading 'faith' for 'love'...huh! Something so profound and everlasting for something so petty and ephemeral'. These were the words of consolation from my soul. 'Accept the bitter truth' my heart screamed. My mind laughed as if it wanted to mock my heart and asked, 'bitter, is it? When you know you are on the right, why is it bitter? Where has your faith vanished now?' My external self..so confused, naive and extremely frustrated. My soul interrupted me saying ' make sure your love does not cloud your vision. Make sure you are able to distinguish between the right and the wrong for i fear the day it blinds it completely. Never fall part or melt due to sweet talks and demeanour. Always stand upright. Hold you dignity, uplift your faith and never let yourself down.' I listened. My eyes moistened, two tears smeared at the brim of my eyes and my vision faded. I sighed. I went in depth today. It was funny that being my owner...i am unaware of my depth. Suddenly i stopped feeling and that is when i knew my heart went offline. My thoughts were just mere thoughts without any sentiment. As the source was once again locked, my soul vanished and stopped speaking to me as if it never existed and i was back to reality. Pink pencil in my hand and books all around me. I smiled thinking, 'what person are you?' Because whatever you are, i want to see more of you maybe you are different' I sighed. I looked up at the clock, it said '1.45am'. It was just those few moments that made me feel this way. It was this feeling where my soul spoke to me. My heart and my mind battled and i was just there, their judge. Analysing and deciphering every word. I felt that my hand mechanically moved carrying information directly from my heart. I did not put in much thought, i just went with the flow. I do not know how you would interpret this but it is no more pure...for the purest of sentiments are embedded in its source which refuses to be renowed. How can you understand it when i cannot understand it myself!