Just Fluff and Stuff

Boys are Idiots

A/N Heeey, I'm back... So like I was telling @lady_rainiicorn during our collaboration for her sexy scene, I fell down a flight of stairs and have been laid up recovering. Have a nice juicy oneshot I wrote while laying on my stomach contemplating other reasons I wish my arse hurt like a mother fucker....

"Ryyy-deeer!" I came into the room full guns blazing and stopped just long enough to see the man himself surrounded by his usual posse of girls. "Again? What the fuck man? Stop fucking my girlfriends!"

"What can I say my man? I am irresistible." His cocky grin lasted just long enough for me to come up to him and throw my right into his jaw hard enough to crack his head around to the side.

"Keep your fucking hands off." I growled. My girl came running in and grabbed my arm, but I threw her off with an eye roll.

"Come on Eric. He was just a quick lay. I was mad about you blowing me off on Saturday and just wanted a good bang. He's a slut, you are my boyfriend; it's not like I want to break up or anything." She smiled as if she had done no wrong and I shook my head at her.

"Naw. Ain't happening girl. We're done. If you think I'm putting myself where that hoe has been... you got another thing coming." She gave me a look like I was crazy and Ryder looked a little hurt, if that was possible. "You know what? Fuck this shit. You want to steal all my girlfriends? I'll get a boyfriend instead. See how you like that, hoe-bag."

I stormed out of the room with a shocked, pale-faced Ryder and incredulous ex-girlfriend and searched the halls. Who was hot? Damn this was harder than I thought. Alright, who did all the girls think was hot? Besides me and Ryder that is... Oh yeah! I saw the blond hair of the footie captain and made my way down the hall.

"Oi, Oliver. Be my boyfriend." I shouted out to him as he stood there looking like I'd lost my mind.

"Fuck off. I don't want to be your butt buddy ya weirdo." He growled and threw a ball at me. I caught it and grimaced. A group of girls had followed me from the room and they were gossiping with the girlfriends as I scanned the halls again, looking for my next victim.

"Georgie! Oi mate! You got a girlfriend?" I hollered. He grinned and nodded.

"Sorry my man. I'm taken. Keep looking though." He winked and his girlfriend I guess slapped his arm. I spun around, avoiding the hopeful looks of some girls as I stormed back the way I came. Ryder was standing there with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face as the girls giggled madly at my antics.

"Eric! I'll be your boyfriend." There we go now. Making a beeline for me was the rugby captain and fucking beast of a boy, Jess. He was one thick meathead, but shit he had muscles coming out his arsehole and the girls all said he was an absolute sweetheart off the field.

"You sure Jess?" I looked up at him but he didn't slow down when he got to me. I was hauled up against the lockers and he snogged the crap out of me in front of half the student body. It took me a bit to respond since, well for one I was surprised, and second I wasn't sure how much I actually liked the guy. He was a good kisser though, honestly.

"That's quite enough horsing around Mr. Campbell." We broke apart, me being put carefully back on my feet and straightened up by... I guess my new boyfriend. I grinned as he walked off and caught a black look from Ryder as he ducked into his next class. Hah. Sucker. Try to steal my boyfriend now ya wanker. I turned to make my way to class and ducked in just before the late bell.

"Is it true? You dating Jess, the rugby captain?" My mate Bri was looking at me with a bit of awe. I grinned and flopped into my desk with a sigh.

"Yep. Linda cheated on me this weekend past. Dropping that shit faster than anchovy pizza. I don't want to catch anything." I glared over at her a few rows chatting with one of her buds. Her one friend Mel looked at me sympathetically, but she'd been no better when I dated her.