youngblood | lrh

▷ 15.

I couldn't take my eyes off my phone. The text message sitting in my notifications nearly sent me into cardiac arrest. One moment I was completely content and watching trashy reality television. The next minute the name taking up my lockscreen was enough to send me into a downward spiral of panic.

River: gabs i miss you a lot and i know this is so random and no im not drunk im completely sober but im at my parents house and they still have all our prom pictures up and holy shit gabi i think im still in love with you

Six months ago, that text would've been the best thing ever. Even if I had gotten it four months ago, it'd still be the best thing. As soon as I've moved on with my life, that's when I get the text. I literally dreamt about getting back together with River for months on end. Those dreams stopped once I met Luke. It didn't even feel right to be looking at this text knowing Luke had only just left my small apartment not even two hours ago.

I didn't know what to do in this situation. Surely I couldn't text him back, could I? I'd hate for River to get the wrong idea. I took a deep breath and dialed the only number I knew by heart, hoping the person on the other end would answer.

One ring.

Two rings.

Three rings.

"I'm at work right now so this better be important, Gabi. Like, Luke proposing important." My sister, Carolina, said in a stern voice.

"River texted me and told me he loved me." I said, hoping she would deem that important enough.

Carolina must've pulled away from her phone because her voice was muffled, "I'm taking a family emergency break. I'll be back in a hour or so." There was a few seconds of silence before she spoke again. "River as in the person who Dad wanted you to marry?"

"Uh-huh."

"He still loves you?"

"Uh-huh."

"Do you still love him?" She asked, the slightest strain of concern in her voice.

Did I love him? I think I did; he was my boyfriend of four years practically and I truly did see us getting married and having our own family one day. I think I loved him in a way where I don't want to hurt him, not in a way where I still want to be with him. "No, that's something else I need to tell you. I think I might love Luke."

Carolina laughed into the phone, scaring me. This certainly was not the type of situation she should be laughing at. "I'm glad that you've moved on, but let's handle this River situation before you get me excited about you loving Luke Hemmings."

I nodded as I shifted on my cheap couch. I wish I had Luke's couch, it was so big and comfy and perfect for napping. My couch smelt like it had been left in a garage since 1976.

"Did you text him back yet?" She questioned.

"No, I didn't even know if I should. I kind of thought about just blocking his number."

"That wouldn't work, his parents know where our parents live. They'd come barging over with little American flags on their suit collars demanding to know why their golden boy son can no longer contact the love of his life." She joked, referencing back to the time in sophomore year when River had said something at school and I didn't text him back all day. His father, a man who had a job in politics, pounded on our door demanding to know why I had been ignoring his son.

I sighed, wishing that I could've just been done with River forever after we broke up. "Lina, he told me he still loved me that night."

She was silent. I didn't talk about that night very often. To be honest, I didn't remember much of it. The combination of the alcohol and everything else made for a good way to not remember the worst day of my life.

---

Roselyn had been the one who encouraged me to go to the party. I was perfectly fine staying in my bed and moping for another week. The hot summer air felt nice on my exposed stomach, the crop top Rose had lent me did nothing for my self esteem.

That was until Kai, River's best friend since forever and one of the most beautiful boys I had ever met, told me he was happy to see me. And that I looked good.

He handed me a red solo cup of I don't know what and we both sat and drank. "You know Gabi," he slurred his words slightly but he was used to getting drunk. "I think River's a damn fool for dumping you. You're so hot and smart and-"

I slammed my lips onto his. He kissed me like I had never been kissed before. River was soft and gentle. Kai was rough and it was seconds before his hands were travelling down my lower back. It took River six months to get the nerve to touch my butt.

River was watching from the porch, acting nonchalant. I knew Kai and I making out, going further in moments than we had in months, had to be killing him.

Kai pulled away from the kiss, whispering into my ear, "I'm taking you back to my place."

I nodded. He grabbed my hand and pulled me away from the party and into the front yard where his car was parked. I made sure to smile at River as we walked through the backyard.

---

"Gabi, I don't know what to say right now. Are you sure he said he loved you? Not that the room felt like lava?" She questioned.

"He told me he loved me, I promise." My phone buzzed. I silently prayed it that it wasn't another text from River.

Luke 💖💖: Can we go out tonight?

He knew. I don't know how, but he knew that River had texted me. He wanted to go out tonight to tell me he was ending things because of River. I started breathing heavy, feeling unable to catch my breath.

"Gabi, calm down. Take a deep breath. What's wrong?"

I tried to take a deep breath, but my chest still felt heavy. "Luke texted me and I think he knows River texted me and I don't know how- Oh my God, Lina, what if River found out about Luke?"

Carolina reassured me that there was no River found about Luke. "Gabi, my phone is dying. I don't have a charger. When are you going back home?" She asked me.

"I'm leaving to go back in like two weeks. Why?"

"I think I'm going to come home for a bit. I think you really need some older sister who can actually be a shoulder to lean on. Gabs, I'm at twenty percent so I have to go. Don't text River yet. I'll be off work in a few hours, I'll help you come up with a reply then."

I nodded, although she couldn't see it. "Bye Lina." I said. She said her goodbyes and I hung up my phone.

Despite the fact that I had the person who I loved more than anything for several years text me, I couldn't stop thinking about something I said to Carolina.

I told her I thought I loved Luke.

That was the first time I had actually admitted to myself that I might love him.

AUTHORS NOTE

hey guys long time no see!!!! june was a super hectic month for me and i realize now i shouldve pre-written some stuff but ya live and ya learn. uhh, this chapter is kinda a timeskip from the last one. i'd say probably bout a month has gone by. uhhh what else..... i actually have a plan from here on out this chapter was a real struggle for me because i had plans for the next 6 chapters or so but this one was rough

qotc 

when's your birthday? mine is november 15th and i'm already counting down the days but i'm also kinda dreading my birthday because i'll be 18 and then i can't sing 'im so sick of waiting til im 18' yanno