My Short Diary Life

Saturday - 29th June

Dear Diary,

Day two of me and Alex's weekend away. His parents left at the lake house by ourselves today, probably wanted us to have some privacy, which is really good. 

As you know, last night I told Alex I loved him. He said he loved me back. Well, it wasn't really like that. We kind of said it at the same time. It was really weird. 

When I got half way down the stairs he was just starting to some up them. This is what he said, "I was just coming up to check on you. And Click, I need to tell you something,"

Me: "I need to tell you something, too."

We were in silence for a few long times, not looking at each other. Staring at the walls or at the floor. 

Both: (At the same time, almost yelling) I love you! (When we took notice of what the other said) Wait what!?

We ran into each other’s arms and hugged and cried and laughed and cried and laughed some more. We went and sat down on the couch by the fire and cuddled up. We fell asleep together by the fire. 

When we woke this morning, still cuddled up. A note was on the kitchen counter, reading:

Hey kidlets,

Thought we'd let you have some alone time, you look like you need it. Have a great day! Use protection ;) Kellie and Timon.

Alex's parents had signed off on the letter. We laughed at the comment they had made. 

Later, we got a taxi down to town and had a walk around. We stopped at this Mexican restaurant for lunch; I think it was called something like "Toca Taco". 

The food was really good there, we had virgin margaritas. They serve the largest margaritas in the world so they were something like 42 ounces. I was struggling to get through it all for a while there; it's a lot of margarita. 

I have to say, spending the day with Alex was. . . Extraordinary. I can't think of anything he can do to make me unhappy. He is like this chemical, or this drug and it's so different to everyone else I know. I mean, my family are great and I love them so much and yes they make me happy but we do get annoyed with each other, same with all my other friends. But, Alex just makes me have this warm tickly feeling inside and it is so weird. No-one has ever made me feel this way. 

So eventually, getting make on topic, we made it back to the lake house. We got our bathers on and jumped into the pool. It was heated, and also under cover.

Alex's aunt must be rich because the roof that goes over the top of the pool has adjustable lighting so the roof can change to make it look like a particular time of day. Alex changed it to be night time. He put on the pool lights as well, that changed colour.

I try not to talk too much about the stuff I do with guys, but we did kind of make out in the pool. On the steps. It was my first "session" of making out, yes I have been out with a lot of guys, and yes, I have kissed them but I've never passionately made out with them or had a real intimate thing going on. 

As it turns out, it was his first time, too. And he also told me that I was his first kiss. I cannot begin to tell you how much I have fallen for this guy. You might be able to tell through these words that I am writing, but it is not nearly as close as how I really feel about him. 

What I had with Zac was so much different, we were a commercial couple. I was head cheerleader for the year eight team, and he was captain of the year eight football team. We were your typical sorority couple. We had also been friends for our whole lives so we didn't have the chance to get to know our other half. We couldn't connect.

But with Alex, it is so easy, we get along, our parents know how we feel about each other and it has no complications.

Until you get to the fact that I am dying. With every day, every hour, every minute, every second I am a little bit closer to my death. I don't want to die, I don't want to leave the best relationship I have ever been in behind. It is so upsetting. I don't think you'll be able to understand, it's so hard to explain. 

I am having the most amazing time on his weekend away. I have to go; we're going out for dinner soon. 

Love ya

Alyssa xx