Never Meant for This

Chapter 4 - Recurrent

-Disclaimer-

I own none of the characters mentioned unless stated otherwise. All rights go to Dick Wolf and NBC. This story is fictional and solely for entertainment purposes. Some scenes/vocabulary may not be suitable for young readers.

AN: Sentences that are in italics are Elliot's thoughts. Some words that are italicized aren't his thoughts but are just used to emphasize words.

__

-May 4th, 7:33 pm, Mister's Bar-

Elliots POV

And then, for the third time that evening,

the world crashed down upon her.

Except for this time,

It was in the form of darkness, a darkness that would cruelly eclipse her consciousness.

Not only would this darkness eclipse Olivia, but it would wash over his body as well. There was only one difference between his darkness, and Olivia's, and it was that she would remain unconscious, while he had to endure the pain of watching his partner fight to stay alive. Her pain was most likely 10 times worse physically, but emotionally, he had the upper hand. Watching her lay beneath him, bleeding out, was one of the worst pains that he'd ever felt in his life. She was virtually lifeless, and this shattered his heart into a million tiny irreparable pieces. He's the one that supposed to take the bullet for her, he thought. Even though they hadn't spoken in six years, she was still his best friend, whether she felt the same way or not. He would take a bullet for her any day.

If he had known what was happening outside of his office earlier, he would have taken the bastard down that held her before he could even lay a hand on her. If it had been up to him, no one would have ever laid a hand on her. It had been six years since the last time they'd spoken, but he's still as protective as always, and time would never change that.

It had been gut-wrenchingly painful to stay away from her for as long as he did, but it didn't even compete with watching as she bled out beneath him. This was a completely different kind of pain, one that's extremely excruciating to him, and almost too difficult to bear. Not knowing if she was going to survive this made his head spin. Just the thought that she wouldn't pull through made him want to scream, cry, and punch something all at the same time. Mainly, punch something.

Although his emotions tended to get the best of him all too often, he was still in control enough to know that now wasn't the time for any of the things that he wanted to do, so he decided to do the only other thing that he could in this situation- and that was to start giving orders. Putting on his strictest face, he started, "Fin, hold pressure down on her abdomen. Pretty boy with the black hair, call for a bus. Munch, get Cragen in here right now. I'm assuming that whatever you guys just tried to do, it was supervised by him, so he'd better be right outside." Amanda looked towards Elliot and said, "My name's Amanda, and to answer your question, we were all undercover, and if you can't tell, it went bad. By the way, who the hell are you?" With a saddened look and tears in his eyes, Elliot said, "Elliot. My name's Elliot, and I was her old partner," he looked down at Olivia with remorse and even more tears filling his eyes as he continued, "I had to leave about six years ago, I'll explain the rest later." Amanda nodded her head and proceeded to ask him if there was anything that she could do. Elliot looked at her and said, his voice cracking, "Can you go find out when that damned bus will be here?" She agreed and broke into a run out of the room. He returned his attention to Olivia, continued to hold her head in his hand, and softly caressed it.

"Stabler? Where the hell did you come-" he turned up to his former captain and watched his eyes become just as wide as his once had when he first saw Olivia. He stopped dead in his tracks and said, "Jesus... that bus had better have its ass parked outside by the time I get out there," and took off as quick as the blonde girl- Amanda, he recalled, once had. Fin looked up at Elliot, and with Olivia's blood soaking his hands, he said, "Elliot, I don't know how or why you came out of that Managers office, but I just want you to know that we're investigating two rapes that took place here. You had better had a damned good reason for Olivia if she wakes up that explains why you're here, and where you went." While he was shocked at Fin's bluntness, he subconsciously knew that he was right. She deserved an explanation and a damned good one at minimum. Heck, Olivia was probably confused out of her mind before she fell unconscious at the shooting alone, and his sudden reappearance likely didn't help that.