tw
i awoke to see my room clean and a note on my table.
text me when you're up - b
i got my phone off the table and started typing.
me: hi
brendon: You good?
me: what even
brendon: Wanna talk?
me: pls :/
brendon: Rikey explained a bit - she said her and the guys couldn't find you and ian.
brendon: Then i heard you screaming. i had a feeling something happened bc you wouldn't let us touch you.
me: im sorry
brendon: Dont be. Please.
me: can i tell u? i trust u
brendon; Of course
me: let sarah see the phone
me: after you called he pushed me against a tree.
me: i told him to stop and 'no'.
me: i kept saying stop like i didnt consent at all
me: he covered my mouth when i started crying
me: then he very kindly decided that he wanted to put his hands down my shorts
me; lets not forget him saying "make this quick"
me: in other words: he planned to do stuff to me 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰then i kicked his nuts
me: oh fuck brendon i hate this
brendon: Im so so sorry. I should have picked you up from the park
me: tf brendon u cant predict the future
brendon: Still! Im your Dad! Its my job to protect you.
me: i was supposed to go school. and i didn't. i lied to u. and went to hang with my friends.
brendon: Im so sorry angel :(
me: ufhdhss ily now st0p
me: i want a hug but im scared
brendon: One sec
my door opened and penny lane scampered in. i bursted into tears and cried into her fur.
me: thanks
me: i hate this
me: the feeling of being so scared
me: i feel gross
me: yay me
brendon: What do you wanna do?
me: idk :/ im scared
me: fuck
me: I HATE BEING SCAREDAKSDDK
me: brendon whats it called when ur so so scared that u cant leave ur room
brendon: Sarahs googling it
brendon: Agorabphobia
me: f u c k
me: jsjssjs kill me rn i hate this
brendon: NO
me: SORRY IM SCARED
brendon: Its okay we're gonna give u space. If u need us, text us. If u want to report it then u can. Its all up to u
me: brendon
me: im scared
me; fml
brendon: We know. Just go easy on yourself and leave ur room when ur comfortable. Let us in when ur comfortable. You need to be okay with it
me: ians a cunt
brendon: I wont tell u off for that
me: fuck school. fuck ian. fuck everything.
brendon: You will be okay. I promise
YOU ARE READING
high hopes | brendon urie
Fanfiction"if i killed myself tonight, the stars would still appear, the sun would still come out, the earth would still rotate, the seasons would still change, so why not brendon?" tw mental health, sexual assault, self harm, suicide attempts, homophobia
