high hopes | brendon urie

44: confessing

"you need to get laid" riley said. brendon snickered and sarah covered his mouth.
"im 15" i replied.
"yeah but you're so shy. like what if you fall for someone - preferably a hot girl - and you can't talk to her? getting laid gives you confidence"
"who's got your v card?" i asked.
"oh err...no one" she stammered.
"shes naturally confident. she dosent need to get laid" sarah said as she took her hand off and licked her coffee popsicle.
"are you condoning what shes saying?" i asked. "no!"
"or maybe you already have eyes for someone" she grinned.
"brendon" i hissed at him.
"i didn't say anything!" he said.
"ha! you do!" riley caught me.
"i-i don't!" i stammered.
"yes you do! tell me! who are they?"
"i don't like anyone! beside i-im not even over janice yet!" i lied.
"oh" she said quietly.

this was awkward.

"i need to wash my hands. i fucking hate jelly" she said suddenly. she got up and skipped away. once she was in the bathroom brendon turned to me.
"that was a huge mistake"
"i know! i didn't know what else to say"
"you panicked. its okay" sarah said.
i heard my bedroom door open.
"wait. didn't you leave your drawings on the table again?" she added.
"oh crap" i ran up the stairs and to my room.

i opened the door to see riley looking through the drawings.
"what are you doing!?" i exclaimed. she spun around.
"you still have feelings for janice?"
"ew no!"
"well if i recall you told me you were not over her!" she said.
"riley its not like that!"
"really!? oh well it sure looks like it!" she threw them down and walked out of the door. i cant let her go. why was she even so mad?
"its you!"

she spun around. 
"its you" i whispered.
"what do you mean?" she asks
"those drawings are us" i admitted. i felt tears form in my eyes.
"im so confused" she said. i took a deep breathe.
"im over janice. i lied so you wouldn't find out that i liked you" i started to cry. i told her. i told my best friend that i had a crush on her. i was ready for her to walk out of the door and never come back. "im sorry. i-i couldn't hold my feelings in so i-i drew" i gestured to the papers scattered around the room. riley was frozen. she then walked towards me and connected our lips together. and you know what? it felt right. after pulling away she wiped my tears.
"the day i met you i fell for you and i dated janice to get over you. im clingy towards you because of how attracted i am to you" she spoke as she wiped my tears away and gave me a hug.

did riley just admit to liking me back?

"is everything okay?" sarah knocked on the open door.
"you guys look hella gay right now" brendon added.
"yeah for each other" i said.
"i knew it! i knew she liked you back!" he grinned.
"i figured brendon would find out" riley told me.
"gaydar" i scoffed. my parents bursted out laughing while me and riley blushed awkwardly.