Hi love...(lesbian story)

Chapter 3

Emmy's P.O.V
"Listen.....it's hard to explain, I...was scared.....hurt....afraid to get hurt....I started to realize around the time that rumor came out of us being gay and dating....that I actually do like you...like I had...have feelings for you, I had so much time.....to.....realize...that if I hurt you and leave then you won't ever find out, then josh and you became friends, I thought he was going to tell you, so maybe I shouldn't have left you..but I didn't know what to do, I truly wish I didn't, I was so afraid that you being straight would hurt me, ruin me, and then Ashley left because she was being selfish and I thought o could too...so I did, camy, I miss you, I thought about you for two years, and realized, I hurt you, and I can't do anything about it, my selfish ways got to me, I'm sorry...." I say tearing up a bit, my mother was pissed when I came out and told her what happened, I can't even be around most of my old friends because of it, she hates me now, so I guess since I was selfish I deserved that. I look at her, she looks pissed. "Are you fucking kidding me! All these years of thinking I'm not good enough and I should fucking die because of you just afraid that your little crush won't like you, EMMY I FUCKING TRIED TO KILL MYSELF! I missed you, hell, I'd take the route you and I used to get to my mothers work, some days and say I miss you but then convince myself that I was dead to you, that you hated me, your selfish ways made me lose more people than I wanted to, then I started hearing stories that you started those rumors, Emmy, I had to go to therapy, you ruined my life because you can't handle your feelings! Go to hell!" She screams at me causing josh to run in, me crying now. I just walk away, I wish I wasn't such a fuck up, I wish I wasn't like this. I lay in my dorm room for about 30 minutes thinking, why does no one actually love me.
*flashback*
I walk with Camryn around our Halloween town festival, Zander actually likes me, I like him to and I know that camy wants me with him, but I'm scared, I have to tell her everything right now. "Sit with me...." I sit down and drag her to sit with me. "So what did he say to you?" I ask her. "Well he asked me if you guys dated how long do you think you guys would last, I said I don't know, and then he said quietly please say forever." That caused me to blush and smile like crazy. "Wait you like him?" An shit. "I do, just if he asks me out I want it to be in person not over the phone, I am just scared. Most guys that date me is because it's because of a dare, or just because. I've always been bullied for my short hair, I was always called a dyke and a fag from high schoolers and I was only 8..." she sat there quietly. "He really does like you...." she finally says after awhile. "You can tell him but just wait for a bit Okay?" She nods. "I guess you're stuck with me and Zander for forever" I say to her as her mom drives to pick us up to bring us to Ashley's
*end of flashback*
I screw everything up, Zander left me because of him smoking pot, camy left me because of me being selfish, josh stayed with camy instead did me. Wait, he is with her isn't he! I ran back to her dorm the door still open to see camy crying into josh. "What the fuck josh! I'm your sister!"
A/n: hi this is quite short, probably the shortest chapter but hey Emmy everything in that flash back is true because she is based on an ex best friend who left me because I was gay, but Zander is based on a true person too and Ashley josh is actually Emmy's brother in real life too.