It's over •JJK FF•[ON HIATUS]

APOLOGY

He was standing at the door of the shop. Staring at me. I didn't know what to do. I forgot about everything else. Jungkook spun around and went out when I ran out after him leaving all my bags and stuff there.
Y/N: it's not what it looks like?
JK: then how is it? He was in your apartment laughing around like a five year old early in the morning. You kicked me out because of that. You're out shopping with him and you clearly just called him "babe"!!! Which other way do I interpret this??? Tell me!
Y/N: it's... It's complicated.
JK: that's the best you've got?? Its complicated???
Y/N:  let's just sit down and talk okay? Stop yelling in the public, they'll know who you are.
**********In a café**********
JK: so you're not dating him?
Y/N: no I'm not.
JK: This doesn't make sense.
Y/N: what doesn't?
JK: How come you kiss a person, go on a date with them and call them babe and not be dating them?
Y/N: I told you- wait how do you know we kissed?
JK: I..um..well .............THAT'S NOT THE POINT.
Y/N: you shouldn't be here with me. Your girlfriend might need you.
JK: It was you who suggested sitting down and explaining things to me.
Come to think if it, I didn't need to explain anything to anyone. But why was I doing it??? I don't understand myself sometimes.
Y/N: Well now that that's out of the way, I think I should get going. I'll see you.....when I see you.
I

grabbed my bag and left the place. All I wanted was to go home. I was thinking about the ride home and then it hit me!!! WHERE'S MARK?! I dialed him real quick. Of course! He's not answering. I wouldn't have too if I was left alone with the stuff my "supposed date" bought and ditched me to explain things to her ex boyfriend. What am I going to do? Where could he be?! And my things? My things are the least of my concern right now but they are in the back of my head. I tried calling again and again. Same result. I was stressed beyond words. I just wanted to ball up and cry. I honestly contemplated calling Jennie and crying my eyes out but that'd be way too selfish of me. What other choice do I have? I go home.
I'm already in a very bad place and if the lady from the 6th floor tries to force her latest gossip on me in the elevator, then I don't know what I'm gonna do.
I reach my door handle and hold it but its open. Now I'm really scared. More like terrified. I don't know if I should call the police or just enter the house. I hit 119 in my phone but don't dial it, my thumb hovering over the call button. I walk in real slow and see Mark on the couch with my stuff around the living room floor in the fancy bags. Guilt starts to build in me.
Y/N: You brought these here?
Mark: It seems that way now, doesn't it?
Y/N: how did you know my pass code?
Mark: Jennie
That's it? Are you that mad? C'mon talk to me Mark.
Y/N: Mark I'm s-  I can- I'm just-
Mark: I think I'm gonna...just...leave.
He walks towards the door and looks back. 
Mark: For real.
No I am NOT letting this happen. I'm not letting people walk out of my life because I messed up. Oh no Buddy, you're not walking out on me. Not on my watch.
Y/N: Mark if you walk out of that door right now, I'll not be seeing tomorrow's sunrise.
Mark: Are you threatening me with suicide?
Y/N: it seems that way now, doesn't it?
His hand dropped down from the door handle in a painfully slow pace.
But I couldn't be happier.
Y/N: stay for dinner, please.
Mark: why? So you can explain the situation earlier like you did with Jungkook? If so, thanks but I'm on a diet for today.
Y/N: I'm not offering you an explanation....even though you deserve one. Just....stay. Will you?
Mark: Hmmmmm
I grinned at his approval.

I ordered some delivery food because ain't nobody got time for cooking. Besides, with all the things going on in my head right now, I'm afraid I might set the house on fire. We're both at the table and eating. I've tried making small talk with him but its not really that helpful. He's loosened up a bit but he's still not satisfied. And he has every right to be. Halfway through the meal, I start the conversation.
Y/N: what happened today..... It should not have been that way.  And I truly apologize for that.
Mark: Look Y/N, *he put his bowl and chopsticks down. Uh oh. Shits bout' to go down* I don't mind helping you get over your ex and I'm making myself okay with that fact, hoping you'll learn to like me the way I do. But what happened today, I don't think you like me at all. I just feel like a- a rebound guy or something. Like you'll use me till your lingering feelings are gone and then you'll dump me. I tried to make myself okay after the little episode in the morning because I really liked you. But from what I see, I'm just another boy toy.
Y/N: Touché. And thank you for liking me. But Mark, I'm not using you. I'm really touched that you want to help me. Whatever happened today, it happened so abruptly and I just reacted like I normally did. We were together for 3 years, following after him when he got mad, it just became a habit. I should have been more thoughtful and thought of you too. I'm sorry.
Mark: that's not gonna cut it. Are you sure you even want to move on?
Y/N: yes mark. I do. I really do. But we had been together for 3 years. Its not a snap of fingers, three whole years. After my parents passed away, all I ever did was study, train and then work. That's all I had done. He was my first...everything. Toxic or healthy he was dear to me. Those feelings are not gonna just go away. I don't think I'm ready to accept you in my life or I like you enough to be with you but I'll get there. I'm trying and I'll get there. So just bear with me. My head's all clouded and I'm so out of place. I feel like a big part of me has been ripped away and I need to find that.
Mark: so you're telling me that you're just playing around with me?
Y/N: Gods no! Mark! I'm not playing the game of push and pull or playing hard-to-get. I'm not making you wait or keeping you hopeful. I'm not making any promises. If you choose to leave then I'm not stopping you. You are free to do as you please. All I'm asking is time and as of right now, forgiveness.
Mark: ..........
Y/N: Mark?
Mark: I'll- I'll sleep over it.
Y/N:  *eyes soft* you do that. If you're done with that, I'll clean it up.
I signaled to the bowl of half eaten black bean noodles.
Mark: umm yea sure. I'll help you with the dishes.
Y/N: its fine. Its really fine.
Mark: Just let me help you, will you?
Y/N: okay okay.

We did the dishes and the tension was no longer there. I'm glad we grew through this.  It was thundering outside. Looks like its gonna rain pretty bad.
Y/N: Do you want to stay over Mark? I can get the other room ready for you. I don't think its wise to drive with the raging weather outside.
Mark: Umm sure. Let me just call Jackson and manager hyung.
Y/N: okay cool.
I went to get the blankets and pillows into the guest bedroom. Yep my life isn't a complete story that I'd have to share my bed with a hot guy. Life hates me that much. I turned up the heat in the room's flooring because he mentioned he gets really cold at nights. I showed him the bedroom and gave him the silk navy PJs to wear. I had bought the couple PJ set as a present for me and Jungkook. Let's make the best use of the comfy fabric. Mark was in his bed pulling up the blanket up to his neck like a little 5 year old. Awww such a cutie. I had a pitcher of water in my hand and I was bringing it to him. He patted the side of his bed, signaling me to sit down. As I sat down, he told me "Listen I'm going to call manager hyung now. I called Jackson and told him about the cover story. So I need you to be real real quiet and be stable in one corner. Hyung might ask me to show him around the room. Okay?
Y/N: wait what? Its been past 3 years you've been working in JYP right? Do you still have the dating ban?
Mark: no we don't anymore but I have not told the manager about you and I've not spoken to Jyp regarding my interest in dating. So I might get in trouble.
Y/N: I'll be as quiet as a thing.
Mark: okay. *flashes a cute smile*
-----------------------face time----------------------
Manager: oh mark? What's up? Why did you call so late?
Mark: Ahhhh hyung I'm at a friends place and the weather is not so good so I'm staying here for the night. Is that okay?
Manager: is it a populated neighborhood?
Mark: no its pretty quiet and private area.
Hyung: okay you can. But no girls or scandals. Alright?
Mark: *chuckles* yes hyung I got it
Manager: okay then have a goo-
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I screamed on top of my lungs jumped up on the bed, my back rubbing against Mark's sides and his phone falls flat.