Warning: this speaks of varying types of abuse, blood, suicide, and a few mental illnesses. Read at your own risk.
I was gonna leave it nameless for people to guess but I'm too lazy to make another chapter to say who it is. So. Merry Christmas in July HAHAHA this chapter is so serious what am I doing. It's five in the morning help.
He was so nice at first...
He gave me sweets at times and I helped him clean his home. He told me stories and maked me laugh. I trusted him. How ignorant of me. I trusted this man to the point where I was wrapped around his little finger. To the point where I let him-- force himself on me and I just let it happen. To the point where I believed his every word and followed his every command. To the point where when my family asks what was wrong, I'd say that I was tired. To the point where I broke. The world was a cold harsh place and I was the most filthy thing to ever walk on the planet. But there you were. At my side all the time. I trusted you. But I didn't at the same time. It wasn't your fault. You know what. And you were patient. You helped me learn to trust again. I know that it was hard. That we'd get someone where then I'd back out. Scared. It wasn't your fault. Sometimes you'd try to hug me and tell me that it's okay but I'd push you away. It wasn't your fault. It was mine. It was because of what that... That man did that I was that way. It was that man's fault that I hated my body. That I had nightmares that I Couldn't trust that I was paranoid.
That man ruined the innocents that I had as a child and corrupted me.
(Guillaume)
Maybe it was my fault
I was a wimpy kid. Afraid of my own shadow. Who would want a kid like that? I was quiet and jumpy but I tried to be of use... But I was clumsy and sometimes I'd mess things up even worse. Maybe that's why she left... Because I Was a pain to deal with? Maybe that's why she drunk so much. Maybe that's why she threw that glass at me. Because I was a nuisance. I guess... I was too innocent. Too childish. Too clingy. If I had grown up a bit faster and if I left her alone I wouldn't have gotten hurt... And she wouldn't have left... I've spent all this time hating her because she hurt me. But maybe... There was a reason behind it? Maybe the person to hate is me... And that being said... Should I give her another chance? I've been asking myself that ever since she sent me that letter.
(Nathan)
I had to grow up fast
I was on the streets of downtown Atlanta until I Was about eight physically. It was rough. It was a dog eat dog world and no one cared if you were dead or alive. Most were poor. Debtors. So they stayed in Georgia to make money off of the resources. Well. I didn't have any land. I was a kid. The plantation owners could have cared less. The other homeless, they didn't care about me at all. I had to fend for myself out there. And let me tell you, it was not easy. Hot summers and cold winters were hard to get through. Food was almost non-existent and you had to be quick if you were to steal. And you had to be careful cause people would take it from you. There was no time to be a child. There was no time to play. Not time to cry. I never remember myself having a childlike innocence. Maybe when I was an infant I did.
(Chase)
~And these will be a bit different So enjooooyyyy~
He was so young...
He just entered the world in the midst of a tragedy. His grandfather had just passed. His mother was grieving. And that meant that she paid him no attention... So I took him in. He was a few days old. When I asked his name, she said nothing... So I sigh and took him to live with me for the time being. I took care of him for the time being. I didn't want to travel with him since he was so small so I sent a letter to his other mother in Scotland so she knew what was happening. In the time that I took care of him, I got to know the true innocence of a child. He was calm and didn't cry much. He had no idea or char what was going on in the world. He was just in a bliss it seemed. It's saddening to know that with age, the childlike innocence he has now will soon disappear.
(Jacqueline)
I'm so...scared...
Every day I worry about my kids. I obsess about what time they should be home when they go out without me. I try to give them as much love and affection I can. Even if they don't accept it sometimes. I worry about their safety constantly and it scares me that I'm not always there. It might be over the top. I might be too much. They might want to get away from me but when you have kids with severe depression... It makes you paranoid. It makes /you/ depressed. It makes you wonder what you did wrong as a parent. It makes you wonder how you can fix it. It makes you wonder in they're out trying to end their lives. What happened to their childish innocence. Is it my fault that it's gone? Did I do something wrong? I'm not cut out to be a mother...
(Piper)
The innocence of a child always withers away. That's the stone cold, cruel reality. And it doesn't only affect the ones losing it... But it can also affect the people around them.
