Alive (TRIGGER WARNING)

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'What do you mean?' She asks.

'I mean, I didn't kill myself. I would never. Why would I kill myself when you're still alive?'
He says as she blushes.

'Then what happened?'

'Aaah, sit down.'

'O-Okay?'

'Listen, I'm going to have to break this down to you.

I have schizophrenia. I do and I admit it. I'm not ashamed of it. It was doing okay before I met you. But when we started dating, it almost vanished. It depends on the circumstances, I guess.
But I was in such a happy place and none of those weird thoughts ever occurred.
I wanted to stay beside you, with you and for you.
But then some things happened and we... we broke up.
That's when it all came back.
That's when it all became worse.
That's when those thoughts came haunting back.
I didn't know what to do and I started blocking out everyone from my life.
It was terrible.
It IS terrible.
And then yes, I admit, I got the thought.
I got the thought that I didn't want to live anymore.
There was a blade in my hand.
Just as I...well...you know, your face popped up into my mind.
And suddenly everything seemed fine.
And I didn't want to go.
But I believe, I slipped or something and
I hit my head and my wrist got scratched by a blade.
It's all still a blur.
But I didn't want to go
I saw your face and I decided I didn't want to go.
Even if we were not together I wanted to stay.
Cause having the chance of even 1% that I could be with you in this day and age kept me going and kept me alive.'

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A/N:

Guys please bare with me, I've wanted to update since such a long time but what to do, LIFE HAS GOTTEN BUSY AF:(
Im sorry but...
I don't think I can do anything :/
Anyways thanks guys for staying with me:)

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