Unidentified Love

Too Many Years

"How did you find me?" Ezra asked, terribly shocked and afraid. This couldn't happen. His plan had fallen to pieces now, she'd never be able to live the same knowing that the monster she hated was alive and deceived her once again.

"I didn't." Aria gritted her teeth, standing still, hoping that this wasn't a dream. How could he do this to me?!

~ 6 hours ago~

Aria was prepared for her first day teaching high school English classes in New York, her schedule worked out and a boring black dress clinging to her skin.

As the day went by, so did any spirit she had for a new positive life. Kids were still the same as always, obnoxious, rude, loud, and annoying. Aria wondered why she decided to take this job then realised how poor she was living in the big apple. She thought that in a big place filled to the brink with people she could disappear, but debt collectors were hounding her all day and night.

"Aria," the head of the English department came into her classroom at the end of the day, interrupting Aria's focus on her marking. Mr Ron was looking at her with a joyous grin - wait scratch that, more of a creepy pervert grin. He obviously already had "the hots" for Aria, how unprofessional. "Can you head over to room 18 so that the teacher can give you the run down on the semester? He's been here for years now, you'll be in good hands. I'd do it myself, but I've got to run." He gave her a creepy glare, looking like he'd rather "do it" with her.

"What's his name?" Aria gave him a blank stare, not giving a care how perverted he was. Mr Ron was taken aback at that, and looked confused at her. It didn't matter what he thought of her now, they signed a contract and she was here permanently.

"Mr Fitzgerald." What a coincidence, Aria thought, her heart beating in pain. If only it were Mr Fitz, then she would be in tears.

~

Aria knocked on the door and waited a moment before anybody opened it. She took the time to inspect her nails, something she didn't care about anymore. Ridged and broken, who would of guessed.

"Hi, they said someone would come arou-"

Aria looked up slowly, knowing that voice so well. He's dead Aria, she had to remind herself, not believing what she was hearing.

They're eyes met and neither of them dared to look away. Aria was too eager as she searched into his blue eyes, those clear blue eyes she knew all to well. Ezra was caught up in the dream of being able to see his love again. How they saw each other in those dark hallways was a mystery, Ezra's class was dimly lit, the light travelling out the open windows on the far side. Even so Aria couldn't help thinking how bright his eyes were in that moment, the ones she'd longed for for years. Too many years.

"This isn't real." Aria began to breathe heavily, the reminder of his death haunting her. "You're dead! Why are you here?" Aria cried out, her hands clenching onto her thighs.

"No, Aria-"

"You died Ezra." Aria choked out, her head beyond reason at this point. "Did I pass out in the hallway? Have I finally killed myself without knowing?" She asked herself, not holding back the tears that streamed down her face. This was the first real emotion she let herself visibly show since Ezra's alleged funeral.

"Why did you say finally?" Ezra asked Aria cautiously, standing still even though he wanted so desperately to reach out for her.

"Because you died." Aria moaned, her voice struggling from crying so much. She closed her eyes, put her head in her hands and sobbed into them. This was turning out to be more crying then when she first found out about Ezra's death.

Ezra bit down on his lips, realising that faking his death did more harm then good, just the opposite of what his intentions were.

"Aria, you're alive right now, you're conscious and breathing." He tried to comfort her by reaching out for her, the touch making her whole body warm.

"I'm going to wake up and you're going to be taken away from me again." Aria said quietly, as her tears dried up and she began to realise that it was real. A fire started to burn in her stomach after that, slowly burning away any sadness she had and replaced it with anger.

"How did you find me?" Ezra asked, terribly shocked and afraid. This couldn't happen. His plan had fallen to pieces now, she'd never be able to live the same knowing that the monster she hated was alive and deceived her once again.

"I didn't." Aria gritted her teeth, standing still, hoping that this wasn't a dream. How could he do this to me?!

Ezra looked panicked by this, realising he could of avoided this and kept his promise to her. What panicked him more though was the fact that she'd wanted to kill herself over losing him.

"I'm so sorry." Ezra choked back his tears. "Y-you wanted me gone so I just..." Ezra trailed off, bringing a hand up to his face and covering his mouth.

"You let me believe you were dead?!" Aria yelled, taking a step back and losing his hand from her arm.

"I thought it would be easier for you, you could forget about me and live your life normally. No complications at last." Ezra began to explain his intentions but Aria wasn't understanding any of his reasoning.

"You weren't just a complication Ezra. You were my first guy I fell in love with, as a matter of fact the only one I fell in love with. Right when I forgave you and was ready to start things again you left this earth. And it killed me. It was all my fault." Aria was talking coldly again, the guilt already a known pain that she carried around everyday.

"I'm such an idiot. I'm so sorry." Ezra wanted to reach out for her again but was scared that she'd send him away again.

Aria and Ezra let time pass like that, staring at each other again, only this time it wasn't in an eager way. Aria was looking terribly broken, her mascara was smudged, her face pale as a ghost, her nails were a disgusting mess, and her hair was now out of place from the ponytail she loosely did that morning. Ezra was noticing beyond that and was taking in all the changes since when he last saw her. She'd cut her hair and dyed it a dark brown, she wasn't wearing eyeliner and it made her eyes seem even bigger, and she'd gotten a little taller, but only an inch or two. He couldn't help it when the corners of his mouth were turning into a smile.

"I can't believe that you got even more beautiful." Ezra said when Aria gave him a questioning glance.

Aria widened her eyes and looked down at the floor, not ready to hear his compliments.

"You can't look at me like that anymore." Aria stated, wiping away any hint of a smile Ezra had on his face.

"I get it, I just can't stop loving you." Ezra felt like his mouth was going faster than his what his brain was, as he let that last bit slip.

Aria bit down on both her lips and tried not to cry. She wanted so badly to kiss him now and get the closure that she's been searching for for the past 5 years. But another part of her wanted to get back together with him and make that kiss last an eternity. And then another part just wanted to run away right now and let this day sink in before she let anything happen.

"I lo..." Aria stopped herself from finishing that sentence. It's not that she didn't love him still, it's just that she couldn't deal with this shocking news and be okay with it in less then 5 minutes. "...I need the semester plan from you."

"Aria-"

"I was sent to get the semester plan. Can you please run through it." She continued and harshly enunciated the last t. If he kept talking Aria wouldn't get to leave quickly, and if she left while he was talking then she would be behind on her work.

Ezra was defeated and Aria was exhausted. Two very similar feelings, although Aria's was a relief she didn't know she'd been holding onto.

Ezra went through the outline and handed Aria a copied sheet, looking longingly at her as she left, and wiping his own tears away.

Is this what it was going to be? Ezra thought sadly, is she just going to acknowledge me as a work colleague from now on? Did my death really affect her this badly? I'm such a fucking idiot. I can't believe I let my mother talk me into this. No way did this help Aria at all.