The Porcelain Afterlife of Momoko Hara

Only

I collapsed to my knees and clutched my broken plastic chest. I had fallen in a pile of muddy snow, gasping for air that would never come. This time I didn't fall because of the wind, it was Jaehyun.

My fall had always begun with him.

"Jaehyun?" Jisoo said and covered her hand over her mouth, "Why?"

"It - it wasn't on purpose," Jaehyun said and held onto Jisoo's hand, "I promise you, I thought the factory closed down again. I locked my bike on the door to save time. When I saw what happened, I took it before the police found out it was me."

"But, why didn't you tell anyone," Jisoo said, her mouth hanging down her pale face.

"I knew they wouldn't believe me," Jaehyun said and began to cry, "But I tried, I tried to make it right."

Jisoo looked down as if she were reading her thoughts, "That's why you took in Min-young."

"At first, I thought I was doing the right thing," Jaehyun said, and let go of Jisoo's hand, "She was so much happier living with us.

But I always felt so guilty every time I looked at her. I think that's why she ran away."

"What do you mean?" Jisoo said and shook her head.

"Jisoo," Jaehyun said stern, "Do you know if Min-young loved me, as more than just her friend?"

Jisoo stared into Jaehyun's eyes without looking away, not even to blink as the snow melted on her skin.

"No," Jisoo said cold, "Min never said she loved you."

For the first time in a long as I could remember, water fell from my eyes. I didn't know if it was melted snow or oil escaping from my broken face, but the tears flooded out.

"Jisoo," Jaehyun said tenderly, "Please understand me I -"

"Jaehyun," Jisoo said and wrapped her gloveless hand around Jaehyun's neck, "I'll always love you."

Jaehyun's face pulled close to Jisoo. Their brown eyes met before their lips pressed and their bodies even closer.

It was only here, at the cold bottom of an empty road, could I see my mistake so clearly.

I viewed myself through Jaehyun's eyes for so long.

I never thought to ask. Was he worth it?

Sometimes the truth only finds you once it's too late.

I laid in the mud, the wires under my gashes sparked as the wet snow seeped in and my arm stretched out towards the light. A pain I had never felt ripped through me.

"Jaehyun," I screamed over and over again.

I didn't care if someone heard. I needed someone to hear me right now.

But Jaehyun didn't hear me scream for him. He heard the piercing sound that replayed in my head.

"Jaehyun," I said in Jisoo's voice, echoing it against the walls, "I'll always love you."

Jisoo was right. I never had the chance to tell Jaehyun I loved him. 
This was the only time and it wasn't even in my voice.

"What was that?" Jisoo said and jumped back.

Jaehyun crept forward out of the light and into the shadow where I laid in a puddle.

"Shit," Jaehyun cursed and paced around, "She's one of those Hara dolls."

"She's crying," Jisoo said from behind Jaehyun, "What should we do?"

"We have to get rid of her," Jaehyun said and ran his hand through his wet hair, "We can't risk it, Soo."

"But what if a person's still inside?" Jisoo said.

"If that thing tells them what I did. I'm going to jail for good," Jaehyun said and pointed to the wall, "Now get on the bike. There's a factory nearby with an incinerator. I have an uncle who works there. He'll let us in."

Jisoo nodded and ran over to the bike.

Jaehyun towered over my cowering body. I couldn't move, but I didn't want to. I looked up into Jaehyun's dark eyes one last time. I had never seen such emptiness behind them.

He threw his leather jacket over me, making the world pitch-black again.