A Million And One Reasons Why I Hate Myself.

The Alley.

"Hey." I turn around, but nothing's there. I must be going crazy. Suddenly, i hear a strangers footsteps behind me. I want to run, but I can't show im scared, momma always said that that was a sign of weakness. A few seconds pass and I start to feel someone grab me. A meaty hand was placed over my mouth, and an arm wrapped around my waist. I squirm and begin to panic as the stranger pulls me deeper into the alley. He slams me to the ground and I try not to yelp in pain. I hear him unzipping his zipper and become even more scared. I'm only fourteen.. what's happening? He lifts my dress and pulls down my underwear. I feel a sharp pain shoot throughout my whole body. I can feel him move his body in and out of mine as he starts to moan. I try to scream, but my sound is muffled by his hand. This pain seems like it is going to never go away. When he finishes, he stands, zips his zipper, and leaves me laying there cold. As he walks away, he steps into the light and gives me an evil smirk. I realize that it's Kyle, a junior on the basketball team. What does he want with me, a freshman?

I stay on the ground for a little longer. I want to make sure that he is gone. When I stand, it feels like my legs are going to fall off and I notice dry and fresh blood on me. Once I start walking home, I secretly hope that no one is awake. I can't let anyone see me like this. I feel so dirty.

When I finally reach home, I see that none of the lights are on, and I thank god. I unlock the door and quietly slam it shut, hoping he didn't follow. I manage to walk myself upstairs into the bathroom and begin to cry. With the little energy I have left, I hop into the shower and scrub my body harder than I ever have before. I scrubbed so hard that my pale, snow white skin began to turn red, like a lobster.

After my shower, I dump my bloody dress and underwear into the garbage. I don't want to remember any of this.