Won't Let Go | Larry Stylinson Mpreg

Nine

Harry just sat there, staring at Louis with his mouth agape. Had Louis actually just asked him for his hand in marriage or was he dreaming it? Out of all that could happen from their chat, a proposal was the most unexpected outcome. While it had been something that he had dreamt about since they had first started dating, Harry wasn't sure if he should accept. He had just gotten used to the idea of talking to Louis again, now he was expected to make a life changing decision?

"Harry?" Louis asked, interrupting Harry's racing thoughts. "Will you?"

"Louis, I...Louis, I don't know what to say," Harry stammered, breaking eye contact with Louis before he spoke again. "This is...this is too much. Louis, I can't give you an answer right now. I just got used to the idea that we were talking again and that you were going to have to be in my life. I'm still not sure what I want. I know what's best, but I don't know if it's what's best for my life and myself moving forward."

"W-What does that mean, Harry?" Louis asked, his voice hushed as it cracked with uncertainty.

"I can't give you an answer right now, Louis. I'm sorry," Harry responded, bringing his tear-filled gaze back to Louis' face that had heartbreak and rejection scribbled all over.

Louis lowered his arms and his right hand curled into a fist as he stood up. With a sniffle, Louis mumbled something about getting to bed, trying to make it seem like he wasn't upset or heartbroken, but Harry knew better. The feeling that Harry had in the core of his heart was one similar. He never thought that he would ever turn down Louis' proposal when the time had come. It wasn't at all how he had pictured it happening - hell, none of what was happening in their reality was what Harry had pictured.

When Harry thought of Louis proposing, he imagined them being out on a dinner date at a pub that they were frequents at. They would both been having a wonderful time, having a laugh and playing a game of pool, when Louis would stop the game and get down on one knee, taking out the box, giving either the most meaningful proposal in the world or one that was very straight to the point. It would be perfect; everyone in the pub would be watching with smiles as Harry would cry tears of happiness and squeeze Louis in a tight hug, accepting the proposal without any hesitations in the world.

The thought of it was so full of hope and joy. It signified lighter times, no complications with management or beards, no babies on the way. It wasn't forced. They both would've been in a happy place without any fighting. However, that wasn't how it was going to be. Harry wouldn't ever get that proposal. He was still trying to find it in himself to truly forgive Louis and feel comfortable with him again. He felt like jumping into an engagement wouldn't be the wisest decision since he hasn't fully processed everything.

Upsetting people was something that Harry hated doing and part of him couldn't help but feel like following him to his bunk and accepting the ring just to get rid of the guilt that he was feeling. With a sigh, Harry put his hands on his pregnant stomach, just wanting to hug his baby girl in his arms, feeling like she was the only thing that he hadn't fucked up.

"Soon, baby, soon," he whispered to his stomach.

-----

Harry woke up the next morning, the feeling of guilt and disgust with himself still there. He was highly tempted to just stay in bed and not move. That way he wouldn't have to face Louis or turn down proposals or anything like that. He looked behind the curtain, watching as the rain hit the window. A perfect day to do nothing.

He fluttered his eyes shut, trying to will himself back into a peaceful sleep, when there was a light knock on the wood bed frame. As tempted as he was to just ignore it, Harry knew that he couldn't do that. Liam and Niall were relentless when it came to wanting attention. Sighing deeply, Harry rolled onto his other side and opened the curtain to the bunk just slightly so he could see. As soon as the natural light cut through the dark bunk, Harry squinted and put his hand up in front of his eyes. When his vision finally adjusted to the light, he looked at the person who was summoning him.