Lost Child (Bleach Fanfic)

Broken Mind

"What do you mean we should stop trying?" Kaien felt his throat and chest tighten with Miyako's words.

"I said we should stop trying to have a child. At this point I feel if it was meant to be it will be."

The fukutaicho of the thirteenth division's voice tightened. "But we can't have children unless we actually do something."

The female looked away from him. "The honest truth Kaien is that you've been trying so hard to please me that you're wearing yourself thin."

"You don't want to have a child?" The man looked at the ground, his hands gripping the leggings of his uniform.

"I'd love to have a child, but I don't feel it is something that will make or break our marriage. I just enjoy being with you so much and this has been eating at you to the point you've become moody. Many of the division members have noticed your behavior. Ukitake and your brother are getting worried. I'm getting worried"

"You would make a wonderful mother though Miyako. You'd make the most wonderful mother in the world."

The female laughed. "What about your own mother?" The smile left when she realized that Kaien wasn't in a joking mood. "We should probably talk about this later. But seriously... we do need to talk about it. Perhaps when you come home from drinking with your brother and the uncles?"

Kaien took a deep breath knowing that this was her way of kicking her him out of their quarters. He left then, not at all pleased with the fact Miyako was dismissing the idea of having a child so easily. "She's not dismissing it easily. This is just as hard on her as it is you."

Drinking with the three taicho didn't lift his mood and he became even more irritated when Isshin invited himself home. He also had the feeling Miyako had taken the time to speak to Isshin about their problems. He planned on having the conversation with her the next morning once his twin brother was gone but instead he found the news of Rangiku hitting all of them hard.

The decision of the head captain was to declare the woman dead which in turn left Isshin in charge of making funeral arrangements for his second in command. Taht eveneing he went and sulked in the quarters he shared with Miyako and sat down so that he was facing the wall. When his wife got home she sat own behind him allowing her back to touch his. "I'm guessing you're not in the mood to continue our conversation from yesterday."

"Now seems the wrong place and wrong time." Kaien continued to look at the wall. "I wonder if something were to happen to nii-sama, ku-chan or Ganju if I would fill this empty."

"Our family came to think of her as a younger sister." Miyako leaned back against him so that the back of her arms touched the back of his arms. "Isn't Gin-chan going to attend the funderal?"

"Gin?" Kaien felt himself swallow. His knee jerked up to his chest and his chin touched the top of the bent joint. He then burried his face in the crook of his arm. "That child is likely hunting down hollows."

"Won't he be grieving like he rest of us."

"That is his way of grieving. He doesn't emote like a normal person. I'd be more worried if he wasn't doing something like that."

"I know we've been sleeping in different futons but let's sleep together. I want to be near you."

"I don't feel up to making love tonight."

"I'm actually glad you're for once admitting that. I don't care one way or another. I just want you to hold me."

Despite the time they spent with each other the stress wouldn't go away. Isshin also was stressed due to Rangiku's death. His normal goofy self was gone and replaced by a personality Kaien hadn't seen since their father's death. His twin also surprised him with his own words. "I'm sorry for this happening when you and Miyako are dealing with your own personal problems right now."

"Don't. Don't go there. Our issue is honestly a family issue as is this. You know that, so stop trying to blame yourself. You're blaming yourself just like you did when father died. You weren't even there Isshin."

"That..." His brother shut his mouth then giving him a rather hurt look. The man looked away. "I know you're right. You shouldn't blame yourself either for things out of your control. I guess there is a reason we're twins."

The next few days were painful but Miyako stayed near him despite the fact his depressed mood was likely causing her to have a similar mood. They sat one night in their room and listened to the rain pouring down. "It kind of fits the mood, doesn't it?"

Kaien felt her soft hand touched his rough and calloused hand. "Something positive will happen soon."

"Sure." The man closed his eyes, taking in the warmth of the small fire. His eyes snapped open when he sensed something outside. Standing up he stood up and walked to the door, sliding it open. Kaien's eye's widened upon seeing the small figure on the porch. There lay a child with white hair. From the looks of the partially opened eyelids the child had an odd eye color.

What really caught his attention was the fact the child's clothing was torn in a few places and there were signs he had been beaten. He turned his head to look at his wife. "Miyako!"

The third seat of the thirteenth division stood up and walked over to the door. "What..." A small delegate hand clasped over her mouth. "Kaien..."

The man moved carefully to the child who was soaking wet. He could hear the ragged breath coming from the boy's lips. "He's still alive Miyako, but I thin one of his lungs is punctured."

"Bring him inside. It's freezing outside. The poor thing."

The man bent down then on one knee and reached out for the child, carefully maneuvering his arm underneath the child and lifting the young one up, noticing how light the child was. Stepping into the room he closed the door with his foot and lay the child next to the fire. Miyako walked over to her healing kit. Her mouth was twisted up showing her displeasure. "How can someone be so cruel?"

"While I agree with you I find it odd that someone would take the time and leave them right outside our door for us to find. Mind you, I don't think someone is trying to send a message or they trying to trap us. Thing is someone, despite everything that happened left them for us to find because..."

Miyako let out a sigh. "They wanted us to find him because they knew that we could take care of them while they could not. I wonder what kind of situation this babe has been through. Kaien... could you get those wet clothes off of them being as careful as possible?"

The man then began to wrangle off the wet clothing. "Bare feet, a short kimono. The kid's likely from the Rukongai." Miyako came over and began to help him remove the clothes and they could see whether the child was male or female. "I wonder what his name is. Someone had to care enough to give him a name."

The woman began to dry the boy's body off, frowning as her hand brushed against the child's skin. "He's burning up. I wonder if there is not any internal bleeding. He may not survive Kaien."

"You'll do your best, right?"

Miyako looked up at him. "Send a message to Unohana. If anyone can save him she can."

Kaien stood up and hurried to where their division kept the hell butterflies and he hurried back when he was finished sending the message. He knelt down next the boy and began to follow his wife's instructions. "I know that he has someone who cares for him Miyako, but if no one steps forward. Do you think we could."

The sound of a deep sigh caused him to look up knowing she would be brutely honest with him. "Please don't get your hopes up. He may not even survive." There came a pause. "But until the time comes we can act as this little ones parents. It seems like he needs it."