Whiskey for Elephants

13.

It was Tuesday afternoon, as planned Ronnie and I just stayed in the house. I made him drink lemon water and honey. We were laid up on the couch, he was playing with my hair.
"Why is dick hair different from head hair?" He asked curiously.
"The follicle structure, keratin levels." I say, distractedly watching Black Beauty on the TV. He went back to silence, still playing with my hair.
"What about nose hairs?" He pipes after a while.
"Ronnie. Google." I say.
"But you're smarter than google." He says, pinching my cheek.
"But I'm watching this movie-uh." I say swatting at him.
"Talk to me. I'm bored. I watch this movie all the time."
"You're so needy. Hush. Go masturbate or something."
"Yes. Okay, can I do that inside you?" He says, sarcastically.
"Uh, no."
"Uh, duh. I just want to love you. Love me, damn it." He climbs on top of me. "I want attention, Danika. Entertain me!"
"Get. Off. Of. Me." I huff. When he does I stand up, go to get dressed and grab my keys. "Go put pants on. We're going to the fuckin' zoo since you're so bored. Let's go look at some elephants, bitch." He gets up, trips, stands up and then goes to the bedroom. He comes out a few minutes later.
"I'm excited."
"You always look better than I do, now I want to change."
"Go grab one of my tanks and a SnapBack. Well match." He waggles his eyebrows and jerks a thumb behind him. I couldn't resist him with the excitement, so I did. When I got back, "Also, I'm driving." He snatches my keys, I groan, and follow him out. He pulled out of the driveway, did like five miles an hour so I could just get close enough. Then homeboy would fuck around and speed up.
"Ronald!" I hiss.
"Okay, okay. Get in, come on." He stops the car and waits for me to open the door. Soon as I do he zooms off. "Psych!"
"Listen you motherfucker, if you don't stop this fucking car I'm gonna dick check you when I get in there."
"You will not. I'll hit you back." He chuckles.
"I bet you hit like a girl." I say as he rides back up slowly. I climb in, finally.
"You're not gonna find out. I don't hit girls. I'd punch Rhonda Rousy though. She'd wreck my jaw." He says, mystified. I buckle my seatbelt.
"I'm gonna have to start kink shaming you, huh?"
"Only if you're not into calling me daddy, princess." He says, leaning on the console and looking at me over his shades. I smack his arm playfully.
"Shut up." I laugh. "Do you know where you're going?"
"Yes. The zoo. Elephants!"
"Right, but do you know how to get there?" I say, chuckling. "Because it's an hour away." I say, putting it on the GPS. We plugged my phone on the aux, playing my Spotify Favorites. End of the road by boys II men came on and I laughed. I know every word, and from that insta video a while back, he doesn't.
"This pain in my head oh I'd rather be dead, spinning around and around," I belt.
"Follow me girl! To the end of the road!" Id always loved when he sang, screamy or not, but I'd always always always loved hearing him sing nineties RnB. Or, would, by the amount of times I played that video, haha. I loved hearing him exercise his vocals in other ways.
So we sang the entire car ride, from Emarosa to Maroon 5. (A/N: I want him to post more karaoke vids on instagram because I dead ass love hearing him utilize his vocals in different ways. Just imagine him singing Sunday Morning by Maroon 5 or something similar.) Which was great, because the entire time we were at the zoo, he sang to himself.
After about an hour of walking around and looking at animals, taking pictures, giving autographs, and giving hugs, we stopped at the concession stand for food.
"Holy shit, Danika? Is that you, dude?" I jumped and almost spilled my drink at the mention of my name from a familiar voice. I turned slowly. "It is you!"
"Hey, dickcheese." I say, punching my brother in the arm. "Where the fuck have you been? Europe?" Derek shakes his head, nods at Ronnie.
"Who's the body guard?" He asks, chuckling. "Oh shit. That's- he's- Bruh!" He realizes. I look at Ronnie, who chuckles at the ground.
"Yeah, hes my new gig."
"Bro! I saw you at fucking Warped! Fucking we both did." Ronnie nods. I go to speak but Ronnie cuts me off.
"Chill, D. I got this," He says to me, before turning to Derek. "Yeah, I know." He makes a thinking face and rolls his eyes so far back into his head that I thought they'd stick there.
"The time I remember," Ronnie says. "Twenty thirteen, Tinley Park, she had short pink hair then and you were wearing a tie dye bro tank. So close if you tried hard enough, you could touch my shoe." Ronnie finishes. He was right. I remembered. So did Derek.
"Oh my god. Dudes. Wild." Derek puts a hand on his forehead, fucking up his blond hair. "Dubai, by the way, Nik. Did you know that, Ronnie? Mr. Radke? Whatever, did you know her nickname is Nik?" My brother rambles on for a moment or two. Ronnie is a champ and just eats his hot dog while listening.
Derek walks with us through the zoo to the car and we give him the address to the Airbnb.
"I kind of love your brother dude." Ronnie says, changing lanes. He inhales a bit. "I Uh, I kinda love you too. AND before you completely get pissed and do the this-is-too-fast thing; I know, it was just eating at me and everyone else knows so i needed to tell you." He speeds through the sentence while cutting across traffic pretty illegally. I thought back on what my therapist said.
"It's okay, Ronnie." I say.
"Thanks, Danika. Nik? D? Dani?"
"D or Nik is perfect. Dani is for the stage." I say.
As we come back in town, we're stopped at a light.
"Ronnie?"
"Hm?"
"How often do you think about kissing me? Or did you when you'd peep insta or just wanna get to know me and be my friend and do dumb shit?" I ask, thinking about the countless nights I'd lay awake squealing to myself because he posted a cute ass picture or a funny ass meme. Nights like those, I'd want to talk to him. Just a conversation. Anything to get to know him. He looked out the window. And back at me.
Light was still red.
"Honestly?" He says after a minute.
"Yes."
"I wanted to beat the shit out of you over letting yourself be with whoever the fuck @EmeryCash was. That dude treated you like shit. He hit you, too. For a minute you had this yellowy gray splotch on the side of your face. I mostly wanted to kick his ass though, the dude after him, Craig I guess?" I nod. "Right, Craig. You posted about him without including the pictures, but you'd tag him in stuff and you seemed happier. So It was like a breath of fresh air, I couldn't click his tag though it would just load an error page. That's why I didn't know who it was."
"But I guess what I'm saying is I've been your undercover dude best friend forever, now. Every time that Emery dude said anything mean? He got a nasty DM from me. That guy probably knows how I feel about you more than anyone else. As far as kissing you? I want to kiss you all the time." He adjusts his grip on the wheel.
"Why don't you?" I ask.
"Consent, you're not my girlfriend, and nine times out of ten I want to kiss you in public. If you're not my girl, I can't do that." He shrugs, bringing the car to a stop in the driveway. He got out and helped me get out. Derek pulled in behind us.
"An Airbnb?" Derek says. "Cool. How many bedrooms?"
"One." Ronnie and I say in unison. Derek raises an eyebrow.
"So, where do you sleep?" He asks me.
"The couch." I say, shrugging.
"She lies, halfway. We switch back and forth." Ronnie says.
"So you're not fucking my sister then?" I open the door to the Airbnb pretending to not wait for an answer.
"Uh. Danika?" Ronnie asks. "What do I do here? Dudes your brother I can't lie to him but you're the publicist."
"I mean, that Craig dude came to Christmas. So, if you are, it doesn't matter. Unless you're married. You're not. You do have a kid though!" Derek went back to geeking and pointing at Ronnie's tattoos, guessing what each one meant and when he got them.