We Run Around With Monsters Under Our Feet [m.y+j.h]

18. LONELY

"The stars look beautiful tonight," Jungkook whispered, head resting against Taehyung's chest the regular beating of the boy's heart just a bit louder than the jazz music coming from the mobile phone on the ground.

The elder hummed, pressing a delicate kiss to the small expanse of skin waiting for his lips just above Jungkook's eyebrows.

"This is really romantic," Jungkook added, words babbling out of his mouth like he had no physical control on what left him. He squirmed awkwardly, bunching some of Taehyung's jacket in his fist before releasing it and unwrapping himself from the elder.

Myriads of winking gold and silver lined the night sky, the moon full, creating a grey-like mist over the trees and illuminating the grass so every blade had a shadow. He should feel calm. The pulsing glow of the night should've slowed his racing heart but perhaps it was being so close to Taehyung that had him shuffling uncomfortably.

Deep inside he felt strange like a worm was wriggling inside his chest making him feel sick with an unknown anxiety. Something was off and he couldn't quite put a name to it.

"Jungkook?" His tone was worried as if he'd been calling out more than that once and Jungkook looked to see Taehyung sat up, his body twisted to look over him. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine!" And even he didn't believe it, propping himself up to wrap an arm around his lover's neck before dragging him down with him for a kiss.

Following instinctively, Taehyung braced himself against the floor, enjoying the soft caress of lip on lip like he always seemed to do with Jungkook. Kissing him really was the greatest. His perfect little lips that he knew just too well what he was doing with and every time they found themselves in this embrace all he could think was how lucky he was to be with the boy of his dreams.

Truly, from the bottom of his heart he loved Jungkook just like how the sea loved the shore. Constantly pulled in and his desire to be with him was uncontrollable. The young boy used to hate him, despised his every move and he knew what the cause was. Jung Hoseok.

He could never pinpoint a moment where his and Hoseok's hate began but he assumed it was when they realised they both wanted the same thing and that was Jungkook. Maybe they didn't want him in the same way but both meant that the young boy was their own and well they couldn't exactly share him.

Sometimes, only sometimes, but it seemed to become more frequent now, Taehyung thought about that letter Hoseok gave him. The sacrifice willingly gave him Jungkook. Not like the boy was something they passed around between them, but that emotional connection he had with him, as deep as it was he cut away from it. The sole problem of why Hoseok and Taehyung had never got along, a life long feud broken just because he gave up.

Granted, he was thankful Hoseok did so, Taehyung might've been strong-hearted but guilt had never been a close friend of his and to hold that to Hoseok's grave made him unwillingly convulse.

Gently, he parted from Jungkook. Rolling over so he was separated from him and they were both looking at the stars again. He bit his lip instinctively, a nervous habit. Why was he thinking of Hoseok? He never used to think of Hoseok and if on the rare occasion he did, well it was only because he was thinking of Jungkook.

From beside him, quietly- for a second he thought he was mistaken- Jungkook gasped. Sitting up straight like someone had ripped him off the ground. Instinctively, Taehyung placed his hand over the youngers, squeezing it softly.

Suddenly, Jungkook looked pale. His rosy cheeks cooled and his eyes seemed panicked. He clawed at his throat and Taehyung worried that he was seriously ill. "Jungkook?" He called out, kneeling forward. "Are you okay?"