Chapter 4

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January 1, 2018

Before I knew what was happening, Bella pulled me off of Harry, kissing my neck. I tried to gently push her off of me, but it only encouraged her more.

I glanced over to where Harry was sitting, to see he was no longer there. I pulled back from Bella and looked around. I found him instantly walking towards to the front door.

I yanked myself from Bella's grasp and ran after him.

"Harry, wait!" I yelled.

He stopped in his tracks, but didn't turn around, leaving his back to me.

I stayed still and silent, not knowing what to do. I didn't really know why he went in to kiss me, and why he was so upset now.

"Why are you leaving?" I finally asked.

He turned around, but kept his head hung low.

"Realized I needed to go do something," he lied.

"Harry, are you alright?"

He took a deep breath, before lifting his head up. Our eyes made instant contact.

His eyes were puffy and watery. He was crying. But why?

"Louis, I'm gay. I thought you were interested in me, and that's why you invited me. You led me on the whole night. But I guess you were just teasing me. But snogging your girlfriend on my own lap? I really like you, if it wasn't obvious. Gosh, I thought you were different Louis," he answered slowly. He said it all calmly, almost too calm.

Harry was gay.

Harry was gay!

And Harry liked me.

But now he was hurt. Because of me.

"You like me?" Was all I could muster out.

"Yeah, I do. I was so excited when you invited me earlier. And I enjoyed hanging out with you. Beating you in Mario Kart, and telling each other embarrassing stories. But I guess you don't feel the same way."

I stood there shocked. I didn't know how to process it all. Maybe it was because I was drunk or because it was too good to be true. Either way, I didn't know what to say.

Harry signed and turned back around. He continued walking towards the door and had his hand on the door knob, before I stopped him again.

"Harry, you have to believe me, I wasn't teasing you. That's the last thing I was doing," I began.

Harry didn't turn around this time when he spoke.

"So what exactly were you doing then?"

I took a deep breath.

"Harry, I'm g-," I started, but was cut off.

"Louis? What are you doing over there? Cmon baby, lets go have some fun," Bella slurred together.

I heard Harry let out a deep breath before finally opening the door.

"Bye Louis," he spoke, before walking out, closing the door on my face.

•••

It was 5am in the morning. I haven't slept at all. I couldn't get Harry's words out of my head. Or the look of hurt on his face.

Harry was gay, and liked me. And I was gay, and liked him back. Sounds like there should be no problems right?

I rolled over on my side and stared at my wall. What do I do?

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