The Dragon Paladin

Chapter 3

A//N
Because I don't know what Ayla and Jondalar's languages sounded like, all dialogue - apart from the songs I sing alone and otherwise specified-  will be in English.

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When I woke up, I was in the tent trashed by the skunk. Walking outside, I know I slept from afternoon, because the sky was grey and the air had a morning chill.

I couldn't control the sadness and grief that overtook me. I stood in the doorway, face clenched, eyes shut tight and throat hitched with my nails digging into me. I ran. Just running. Ok, fine. More like sprinted. As I powered over a short distance, the tears flowed. I only stopped when I tripped and flipped over, landing in a heap on the grass.
I let myself cry. I never cry for more than two seconds, if I force it. Not for the last several years. I'm 16 now, last time i cried for more than 5 minutes, I was 13. And it was because I couldn't go see my friends at a camp because i got sick.
But now? I'm crying because I have lost my home, my family, everything. My friends, career, job. What chance do I have of getting any of that back?
Fresh tears fall. I've been  out here for a while. I look up at the sun and measure the time with my hand. Wow. Crying in an open field for 10 minutes. Aaaand I'm not done. I force myself to stop. Unfortunately, this results in hiccups.
I manage to stop. I wipe my face,  and stand up. I'm a bad singer, but who's gonna stop me?
I take a deep breath, and try to recall the lyrics.

You were the shadow to my light,
Did you feel us?
Another star, you fade away.
Afraid our aim is out of sight,
Wanna see us, alive.

Where are you now?
Where are you now?
Where are you now?
Was it all in my fantasy?
Where are you now?
Were you only imaginary?
Where are you now?

Atlantis,
Under the sea.
Under the sea.
Where are you now?
Another dream.
The monster's running wild inside of me.

I'm faded.
I'm faded.
So lost, I'm faded.
I'm faded.
So lost, I'm faded.

These shallow waters, never met.
What I needed, I'm letting go.
A deeper dive.
The eternal silence of the sea,
I'm breathing.
Alive

Where are you now?
Where are you now?

Under the bright, yet faded lights,
You set my heart on fire.

Where are you now?
Where are you now?

Where are you now?
Atlantis.
Under the sea.
Under the sea.
Where are you now?
Another dream.
The monster's running wild inside of me.
I'm faded.
I'm faded.
So lost.
I'm faded.
I'm faded.
So lost.
I'm faded.

I sat down, my head in my hands. Breathing hard, I stretched my legs. I can't think about them now. Not anymore. Not forget about them, just don't think about them. I wiggled my toes. No more music. No more ice skating. No more anime.
My old life is gone. I stand up and brush myself off, before heading back to the camp.

I can't stop the next song, for missing the few people who could make it okay.

When you hold me in the street,
And you kiss me on the dance floor.
I wish that it could be like that,
Why can't it be like that?
Cos I'm yours.

We're keen behind closed doors,
Everytime I see you i die a little more.
All those moments that we steal as the curtains fall,
It'll never be enough.

I am about to continue when i look up and see another brunette. I walk towards them hoping against hope that it's one of my friends. Sneaking my way around, I see that it is indeed one of my friends. Gracie. We're both in the Hamilton fandom, she's only 2 years younger than me. I sneak up behind her, covering her eyes with my hands. She panics and struggles for a bit. "Shh, shh," I comfort. She stops. I smile.
I lean into her ear.

How does a bastard, orphan, son of a whore and a scotsman...

I wait for her to register. When she says nothing, I continue.

Dropped in the middle of a forgotten spot,
In the Caribbean, impoverished and squalor...

She comes in.

Grow up to be a hero and a scholar.

I let her go and she turns around.
"Ellie?" "Gracie!!"
I hugged her and cried. "You are the first familiar person i have seen so far. Granted, it's only been 2 nights. But i genuinely believed i wouldn't see anyone again!"
"Oh, Ellie, I don't know what happened, i just went for a walk on a windy day and after a particular gust i found myself here, 10 minutes ago. "
We just held each other and cried for a while, enjoying each other's company.
"Come on, we'd better head back up to the camp and have breakfast," I suggested. She looked at me nervously. "Don't worry, it's only 2 other people, two horses and a tame wolf." My friend didn't relax. "You'll like them, I promise!"
"Ok, fine. I have no chance on my own. Where did you get those  clothes, anyway?"
I tell her my story as we begin to climb. Upon nearing the camp, I turned to Gracie.  "Remember, Ayla and Jondalar don't speak English. So we'll just have to forget about English, ok?" She nodded.
I frowned. I had a feeling this would not go down well with Jondalar.

When we reached the camp, I turned to make introductions. Only to find Gracie had disappeared. Into thin air. Poof. Gone.
I crashed again. Screaming into the void, i fell to my knees and started crying again.
Damn it!!
I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up, into the eyes of Ayla. She started speaking in her language, but despite knowing she was trying to comfort Me, I couldn't understand what she was saying. It sounded familiar, where had I heard it?

She turned to Jondalar, and then back to me. Before I could stand up, my back suddenly felt like it was being ripped open from the shoulder blades. Keep your mouth shut, keep your mouth shut keep your MoUTh SHUT!!!
I curled into a ball, trying not to make any noise. After a while, the pain subsided to a manageable ache.
And so it continued for the next 6 days we were there. I watched them hunting, curing, butchering, creating. In the mornings, I would point to things, asking for names. I asked Ayla about plants, after seeing one that looked like yellow string. Golden thread, she called it. She signalled it was good for stings and insect bites. I thought back on the books I'd read, and tried to ask if it was a contraceptive by placing a hand over my uterus and shaking my head. Her eyes widened in fear, and then she nodded. I have endometriosis, a condition where risk of death in childbirth is greatly increased. Only about 20-30% of mothers survive. And endometriosis and/or polycystic ovaries only increase your chances of dying. But hey, birth control also helps regulate menstrual flow and easing cramps.
She starts showing me how to make teas.
I start learning to cure hides and weave. If i can't go back, I might as well learn to make myself useful.
I think, once we get to Jondalar's home, maybe I could introduce fabric? Like, wool. I'll make a loom and thread. Yeah. That's a good plan. And maybe I will skate again. We just need to stop at a place with lots of frozen water. I smile to myself.
I'm going to be okay.