AMARANTHINE

Act III (viii) : Return to Me

"You have punished me long enough, you have punished yourself long enough. Return to me, I beg"

~ Melissa De La Cruz ~

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Aabha had woken on the morning of the wedding, filled with a nameless dread, she could not finger it but knew that something would happen that day and that anticipation gnawed at her. She had not been able to sleep for most of the night and could not stop thinking about Shaurya. She kept thinking about their conversations, his confession, her fears and his parents' faith in her. She was in conflict, as were her heart and mind, and though she tried to rationalise her emotions, her heart would sprout new fears. As night slipped into day, she had no clarity and when she found everyone enthusiastic about the wedding, she turned melancholic; the evening would also bring Shaurya's presence. She wanted to see him and yet did not want to meet him.

She looked at her hands in despair, Ishaani had even managed to have the mehendi artist paint Shaurya's and her names on her palms and her henna dyed palms, with their intricate auburn lines that traced and entwined their names together, seemed to be mocking her. Confused and hoping to find comfort in something familiar she had worn one of her old dress, one that she had bought during those early shopping expeditions with Ishaani, who had insisted that Aabha add a few Indian dresses to her wardrobe. She had been very uncomfortable with the ghaghra selections, the idea of exposing her entire midriff did not seem appealing, till she chanced on the combination of net and silk blouses, where the plain silk blouse had a net overlay which extended till her knees. She had loved the idea, though the net top had high side slits.

She slipped into the simple, almost plain, peach dress, a memory of simple days and peaceful life, thinking about the evening and how it would be to wear the rich silky, intricately embroidered ghaghra that had been selected for her. It was a deep blue, worked in silver and pearls, a colour that had been selected by Ishaani, keeping Shaurya's preference in mind. Aabha did not need to be told that, she knew Ishaani and Shaurya quite well, and she did not look forward to wearing a colour which he loved.

Even more disturbing was the thought of having to face Shaurya. There was no way she could make an excuse, she would have to be beside Ishaani throughout all the ceremonies and would not be able to avoid his presence, for he too would be there for Reyansh.

Aabha had spent the previous day in absolute misery and had not made any effort to even hide it. All the women were busy with the final preparations for the wedding, so few paid much attention to her. But then there were so there were many last-minute things to be done that her mother had to enlist her help, though Mahua did take a few minutes to talk to her, " It is not fair that Ishaani has to bear the brunt of your moping. I know it will sound unfair, but then you have been away for three years, Aabha, and though it was right to leave then, you cannot do the same thing now. If you do it now, it would be running away. And yes, I have an idea of what happened, Ishaani told me about the party and Shaurya's confession. It does change everything, now, does it not?"

Aabha nodded, unhappy with Ishaani telling her mother yet relieved, "Maa, I do not know what to do. How can he fall in love with me without remembering who I am? What does it mean for us?"

"Aabha, I am not blind to your feelings and doubts but I cannot help you in your confusion, you have to sort it out yourself. It is easy for all of us to give you advice and yes, all of us would have the same thing to say, 'that you do not have to worry about anything now, you love him and he has fallen in love with you, so there is no problem.' But I know that you do not see it that way yet, as I said, I cannot help you at all, you have to decide what to do. And maybe if you focused on something else, it could help you relax so that you would be able to think it out better?"