The thoughts of a girl called Mimi

Self esteem

Self esteem.
Something that humans should have.
I did not say will.
I said should.

So Mimi why stress your wording.
Hahaha Well.
Wanna know something.

I don't have one. YAY.
U may be thinking "Pffft Mimi stop being so dramatic of course u have one. Don't be so bloody stupid".
Ok right jeeeze sorry. Now I may have been exaggerating slightly but still.

When i was in primary I was really confident. I could not care about anything anyone said that was meant to put me down. Now is a totally different story. So what changed. Hmmmmmm  a lot. I'll explain the stuff that happened with friends. Other stuff I may say in the future.

So primary 7. The last years before my mind became tainted by the sweet sweet school for pubescent adolescent teens. I was placed in p6/7 ( a class where a group of p7s is placed with a load of p6s). No I wasn't placed their bc I was stupid. Quite the opposite. It was because the teacher in the other class wouldn't be able to teach me and the others separately without wasting too much time. So the 3 smartest students and the newest ones were placed in my class. The smarter of the 9 of us included. Me, nadine and Rosie. The others were Cady, Tom, Lucas, Fin, Porsha and Luke. Being placed in this class was strange since during the last six of my primary school years I was in all the straight classes (P1,P2,P3,P4,P5,P6).So moving on.

The main people of this story are Porsha, Nadine and Cady.

So let's start with Nadine

Nadine was my best friend and had been so since P3. We pretty much met in a line when she pushed in front of me. She was quite possessive and got annoyed with me if I spoke to anyone else.

Next let's move on to Cady.
Cady was generally really nice. She would say she had my back but go hang around with the other person. Strange two faced In way. She was really nice and did make the year easier but she did hurt my feelings when it came down to it.

Last of all we have the biggest bitchy shitstirrer of them all.
Porsha. Porsha was full of her self and couldn't stand if I did better than her. At the time she would pretend to be friends with me but then she would seclude me and leave me out.

So these people were in my class and I used to hang around with them. It all began when Nadine started acting cold. I didn't really understand what I'd done but by now I'd had enough. I spoke to her and all that I mean I couldn't have just not. She would say stuff about my intellectual matter and about how her mind was superior to mine. She picked on me and left me out. It left me feeling upset since i had been friends with her for a long time. Cady and Porsha saw this happen and decided that they didn't like it. So they made friends with me. I became friends with all the boys in the class and Nadine hung around with Rosie. Me and Rosie had been friends for years so we were still ok. Cady and Porsha were good friends and Porsha had came to the school the war before. So they were only new friends. I joined their group and all was good for a little. Nadine still said stuff but I didn't mind it since I had other people to be with.

I am very athletic and would say I am quite good at sport. Porsha and Cady were also the same so it was nice to have people to do this type of thing with. We used to play tag or build up with Tom, Lucas and Luke. Porsha after a while used to say go for Mimi she's the slowest I'm the fastest ha ha. Now I was kinda upset about this. It didn't let it bother me. The others would stick up for me but she continued to do  it anyway. After some time she resorted to pushing me during races and tripping me up. The others wouldn't notice and it didn't make me to happy hat she was doing this. I didn't quite get why but decided hat it could just be coincidental. So things continued like this I became shyer and my self esteem plummeted down. I was having a tough time at home and I was struggling with everything I had to deal with. Suddenly out of the blue Porsha demanded me to race her. Now I'm quite competitive so I was pumped up for this. I smiled and agreed to the race. Everyone was with us and they counted us off. We ran around the school campus. Me in the lead the whole time. I rememebr finishing first and she came over to me at the end and smacked my knees in. I have extremely bad knee problems. A shooting pain cam from my knees down to my ankles. I found it difficult to move but while her back was turned I grabbed the back of her shirt and began to bellow at her. I asked why she did this, why had she been doing all the things she had. She replied with a smile and said. Why not and anyway what right do you have to get angry with me when we took you out of that situation with Nadine. I was dumbstruck. This girl wasn't intelligent but she knows how to get what she wants. I let go of her and she walked into the class. Sports day was the next week. It was calm till then since we managed to sort things out (more like me sitting in the backround being quiet)

Sports day came. I was really excited since I was house captain. We had done well during the potted sports and I was proud of my team. After lunch was when it all began. We were in line for our race.
3
2
1
GO
I ran as fast as I could. I was so surprised to see only two girls ahead of me. I sprinted as fast as I could and managed to get in front of one of them. In that race I placed second. Porsha placed 3rd. She claimed to have beat me but everyone said she hadn't. She jsut smirked and said. How could this girl win she can't even run that fast. She walked back to her seat along with everyone else. I didn't feel happy even after I placed 2nd. I went back to my seat a couple of minutes after everyone else. Things were like this until 3 weeks later. It was the awards evening and I'd been nominated for 5/6  awards. This was shocking since usually your were only meant to get to be in the running for twoat the most. We sat beside the stage waiting for each award to be read out. I placed second or third for the other ones but then came the sports award. I wasn't even paying attention. I believed that I would manage it. 3rd place was Porsha. Wow I thought. I have no chance. Second place was Charne. This was weird since everyone expected her to be first. I was confused who was going to be first. I was 100% sure it was Cady since she was really good at sports.

My thoughts took me to somewhere else.
"Mimi,OI,MIMI".
I looked up the person next to me was tapping me telling me to go to the stage. I saw Porsha with a really sour look on her face. Then I realised hat I placed first. I was so shocked I went to get my prize. I walked past Porsha and said. " would you look at that, you say your better at sports than me yet you can't even beat me. Hmm how funny" everyone near by that heard went into hysterics.

Since primary I haven't ever been able to lift my self esteem problems. They used to also say stuff about my skin. I mean yeah I don't have perfect skin but it's not that bad. I get oily and I do have skin that can breakout but it still bothers me to this day. The stuff they said. Now I don't have too many spots but I still can't help but worry about what people think of me.

I'll explain more about this next time but I mean No bitch apart from me gets the last laugh. Me and only me.

Authors note.
Ok so sorry about my late post by about two weeks. I have no excuse so I ain't even gonna attempt promising a new chapter within a week. I would say that I will have one chapter per month at least. So please keep reading and sorry about he lack of chapters :p