"We're Gonna Be Alright"

||10||

The next morning, neither of us discusses yesterday's events. Jason makes me breakfast and we watch a TV show together, in a comfortable silence.

"You slept well?" he finally asks.

"Kind of." I say.

"You do not need ..."

"I am extremely sorry about my behavior. I guess i was too affected from my dream, "I say, not wanting to discuss it with him.

"Ariana I know you've had a nightmare, it's all right, does this often happen to you?"

"Every night." I say honestly.

"This is not good." , he answers sadly.

"I can not do anything about it."

"Did it help? The fact that i was lying next to you?" she asks me, stroking my hair.

I shudder, but it doen't break my boundaries.

"I don't.."

"You don't have to hide. If it helped, just tell me."

I don't talk for a few seconds.

"Yes, it helped a lot." I honestly answer once again.

"I'm glad you're honest, and if you need me to sleep next to you every night so you don't have nightmares, then i will."

He smiles at me.

Why is he doing all of this? And why even if he has he shown me how much he wants to help me I am still not convinced?

I have trust issues. They just do not let me live like a normal person.

"I honestly thank you Jason."

"You don't have to thank me."

The rest of the time passes happily, until we decide to get out of the house.

He leads me to a shop and lets me pick some new clothes.

"Now I feel bad."

"Why do you feel bad?" He looks at me with a confused expression.

He doesn't get it...

"You want to buy me clothes with your own money, it's not right, I can not accept it, you've already done so much."

"Are you not my protege?"

"Protege?" I try the word.

"Yes. You know, i take care of you, I provide you food, clothes, and a house. I promised you I would do it. Don't make me break my promise Ariana. "

I think my cheeks are flushed. Protege...

I do not feel comfortable with him buying me clothes...

"Do you want to go to the movies?" he suddenly asks.

"The movies, really?"

"Yes, don't you like the idea?"

"I did not say that but ... do you actually want to go or you just want to entertain me in some way?"

He signs and comes closer to me.

"Ariana, you must understand something, because I think you really feel bad about a pointless situation. I really want to do whatever I do for you. I do not need to entertain you, i just want to spend some nice time with you. You are not a load or a mess. Why can't you see that? "

I drop my head.
He does everything for me and i still can't just fully trust him...

"Ok now I really feel bad" I say.

"Do not feel bad. Everything is as it should be. Just relax, okay? "He asks.

He approaches me and  I think he wants to hug me.

I do not move, but when he hugs me gently, I close my eyes horrified. He doesn't move for a while but then he strokes my back and finally pulls away with a worried expression.

"I didn't ask for premission, i am sorry. You just always seem so scared for a simple hug... I'm going to help you get over this. A hug should be something pleasing and warm."

"It's actually not so bad with you ..." I say with a small smile forming on my lips.

I want to be able to embrace him, honestly, normally, like all the people do.

"See?" she says, smiling wide.

As we head to the cinema, I look at Jason.

Things are actually not so frightening when he's with me.