A thousand nights

XXIX

Two hours later, I found myself closing the backyard's door behind my back.

I entered home not expecting dad to be there, but yet again life decided to surprise me.

Crouched on the floor, he was tying his black combat boots lazily. As soon as he heard the door shut behind me he looked up, the sad look on his face caught me off guard.

'What's the matter?' I inquired already knowing his answer.

'Nothing son' He stood up ' I'm going out with Luke, we need to catch up on life, you know?' He tried smiling but it came out more like a grimace. It was the weakest excuse I had heard from him so far but I didn't press the subject, it was the most he had talked to me since right before Paris.

'Aright, say hi to Luke for me' I said. He furrowed his eyebrows and scanned me from head to toe. His shoulders then dropped and his face turned back to its expressionless form. He nodded and by pushing me gently out of the doorway he left.

I took off my shoes and placed my bag in the living room. I collapsed on one of the couches and went through the notifications on my phone.

The pleasures of not having data and the school WiFi, I thought.

 I scrolled through my emails looking for an email from school, wondering why I constantly signed up to so many things that just sent me spam emails. 

Your facebook friend has change their status

offer valid for two more hours

I rolled my eyes at these. 

My thumb was almost hit the delete button when I noticed that one of the emails was't actually a scam. I clicked on it and read its content.

Hey Park,

It's Shai, long time since we last spoke right?

I know I don't deserve to be forgiven after what I've done to you, and I know that so much time has passed since then but I'm sorry. I really am. And I miss our disputes and your weird obsessions, I miss talking to you and our leaf jumping.

00873025 This is my number if you ever wanted to talk,

Keep in touch,

Shai signs out ;)

I had to read the email a couple of times more to let the words sink in. After four years of silence, she had decided to reach out to me, after four years.

I didn't blame her though, she knew that from the emotional point of view of things I was a wreck and nothing could prevent me when I was having a breakdown of any sort. I still remember how I cursed at her, my anger was very hard to control at the time, I, in fact, started throwing chairs and tables as soon as I got home that day. 

I grabbed the house telephone and dialed the number she left at the bottom of the email wondering if she was going to pick up.

The phone rang once, twice... I started feeling my palms getting sweaty and I tapped my feet trying to concentrate on something. At the eighth ring, she picked up.

'Hey-'

''Hello, Hello, if you hear this message it means that I am busy. If you'd like me to call you back, leave a mess-' I hung up. What was I even thinking? That she would have answered straight away? I looked at the time she sent the email, it was three months ago. This is what happens when you don't check your email regularly. 

Of curse she was busy, people had better things to do than waiting on you, I said to myself hitting my face with a pillow.

I was starting to contemplate what to do next when the phone started ringing in my palms. I saw the same number I had just dialed appear on the monochromatic screen and without even thinking I picked up.

'Hello?' her voice said.

'Hey..' I said uncomfortably.

'Who's this?' 

Right, she couldn't even recognize my voice. 

'It's me' I hesitated 'Park'

'Park? Oh my God!, How are you? How is everything? I'm so sorry, for everything' she said all in a breath.

'No, no, I'm sorry, I called you names that no one should ever say, I was violent and stupid and..'

'Don't even dare apologize, I backstabbed you, you just reacted like every normal human being would have done, so don't feel like it's your fault okay?' she said. Her voice was still as I remembered it, deep and rich like the sound of the notes of low F chord on a guitar.

'Yeah' I breathed.

She laughed 'You still haven't answered my first question man, tell me about your life'

I told her about life so far. I told her about the school system and my grades. I told her about how my music taste had morphed since I moved to London, going from the latest top ten songs on MTV to the unheard indie tunes of underground bands.

'Magic what?' she asked me.

'Magic giant' I repeated returning to my list of bands. I asked her questions too, but she dismissed them after giving a couple of details. Each word we each uttered built up onto the appearing pit-less conversation. 

It felt good. 

It felt like a part of me that I was missing had been placed back in its rightful place. She had been this constant face in my life which I was unable to notice the importance of until she was stripped away from me. I could still remember the toe twirling wind of that late afternoon. Her words carelessly scraped the side of my chest. He says that he cries to sleep, she had said to Jamie, no way, I just hang out with him because I feel bad for him, like look at him.

'Park?' Her husky voice drew me out of my thoughts.

'mhm?'

'I really am sorry, the guilt hunts me every day, I-' her voice broke.

'Hey' I whispered sitting upright 'it's okay really, I wouldn't have called you if it wasn't' I reassured her. I didn't have any rancor left in me, just a slightly bitter taste whenever I thought about what she said to Jamie.

'I'm glad you called Pc' I could feel her smile from the other side of the receiver.

'Haven't been called that in so long man' I sighed, it felt like I was diving into memory lane.

'Of course you haven't, I was the only one who called you that ' she paused ' on a serious note, you speak like a brit now'

'I do not' I snapped outraged .

She laughed 'I do not' she mocked. 

'Shut up' I frowned

'I was just messing with you dude' she chuckled.

'Yeah okay,' I rolled my eyes.

'I missed you Piccadilly circus, you have no idea'

'If you refer to me with something that starts with P once again, I will hurt you' I threatened. 

'Look at what London has turned you into Packman'

I smiled at that.

We carried on talking for the rest of the evening, and my heart felt like bursting open at all the memories that led me to this very couch in the town of Murray.