If Only

Mr. Brace discovers

I went to school early like I do everyday. When I got there I went to my locker and reorganized it. I took my lunch and went to the garbage can at the end of the hall. I threw it away and went back to my locker. With in seconds of making it back to my locker I hear footsteps. I turn to my left and Mr. Brace is standing next to the trash can. Did he see me? I smile at him and look back at my locker. I take out my books for morning classes and turn to go to the art room. " Will you please come to my class room for a moment Amanda?" I turn around and make up an excuse about my art project. " it will only take a moment." I nod and follow him to his class room.

He sits at his desk and I sit in my desk from class. I look at him ready to deny anything he throughs at me. What he said next surprised me a little. " So how is Megan?" I reply simply that she's good. Though I haven't talked to her in awhile outside of class. "She came to see me after school yesterday. She said she was worried that you were purposely not eating enough and always at the gym." I sat there with a look of surprise on my face. Which soon turned to pain at the betrayal that Megan did. "I told her I'd look into it. When I saw you throw your lunch away I see that she's right." I was frozen in fear. What was he gonna do with this information. He's gonna tell my parents.

I began to hyperventilate. I stood up abruptly and knocked my desk over. He was out of his seat in an instant worry written all over his face. I slowly backed up until I hit the wall. I continued to slowly slide down the wall into a crouching position. I was having a panic attack.

When it was starting to recede Mr.Brace said that he would have to tell somebody. I told him that he couldn't. Not yet. Not when I was so close. He asked me what I meant by close. Should I tell him about the messages? "They say I'm getting so close to being pretty. That I'm almost there. Please don't tell I'm almost there I have to be persistent and follow what I know at heart."
"Who says? Is someone telling you to do this?" He said with alarm in his voice. Crap. I said too much. The bell ring for first period and I got up and left. I left his classroom. I left the school. I left. I went into the woods to think of a solution. By the end of the day I had one.

When i saw Mr. Brace walk out of school I ran up to him. I told him I had a deal. I eat lunch everyday in front of him to make sure I eat and he doesn't tell anyone. He agrees.

The next day I go to his classroom and eat lunch. I eat everything. Afterwards I go to class. At the beginning of class I ask to use the bathroom. I go to the bathroom and make sure no ones in there. I throw up my lunch and go back to class. I didn't enjoy throwing up. But it needed to be done. After school I decided that someone might see me at the gym and that I should start working out at home.