Hi. It's Allie. Welcome to my fucked up head. I found out the other day I have cyclothymia, which is a form of bipolar disorder with less severe mood swings and more feelings of hopelessness and guilt. Sounds fun, doesn't it? So anyway Vanessa and I haven't made up yet. And I'm fucking depressed about it. Cuz I really really like her. As in, wanna take her out on a date and hold her hand and cuddle with her and... Ugh. But that doesn't make me a lesbian. I'm not gay. I'm in love with her mind rather than her body.
So anyways I'm driving up to my gramma's house right now in a really really tiny rental car and I'm super claustrophobic and freaking out. I feel like the whole thing is closing in on me. And it's scaring the shot outta me. It doesn't help that there's a gigantic thunderstorm and hurricane warnings right now. I'm damn terrified. I need someone to get me outta this car and take me homeeeeeee. Oh yay One Thing is on!!
Yeah, if you couldn't tell from all the One Direction fanfics in my reading list, I LOVE ONE DIRECTION!!! And yes I'm one of those creepy girls who knows every single thing about all of them. And who's been in love with them from the very start. As in I've wanted to fuck Louis Tomlinson from the first time I lay eyes on him.
Randomness time: if I had three wishes right now, here's what they would be
1) to be Louis's girlfriend (sorry Eleanor)
2) For me and Vanessa to be friends again
3) that I could eat as much crap as I wanted and still be skinny
I'm sooooo panicky in small spaces......
Well guess what guys!? I just got a text from Vanessa saying to FaceTime her when I get to my gramma's. I'm really seriously hoping she wants to be friends again. Or something like that.
And now were stopping at Taco Bell!! Yay I can get outta the car!! (for some weird reason my mom refuses to go to a drive through) I can finally breathe!!!!!!!!!! Ok well I'm about to enjoy a taco. Bye bye.
