Being Lost

Chapter 2

I want to thank @canzies for the awesome cover! Thank you very much :)

Chapter 2

I remember my first day at this place, with Clara stuck to my butt and her handsome best friend who tried kind of to hit on me being friendly and welcoming. I'm sure that the hit on part was just a joke because he seemed like a nice guy. And it was the first time in ages I was saying about someone that he looked like a nice guy because my history with guys is quite long and complicated. But if I'm being honest, it wasn't complicated.

To me, it was pretty simple. Whenever I needed it, I would get it. For the ones around me, it seemed messed up. I know, it's not a normal thing to do for most people. But I wasn't most people, and sure as hell, I wasn't looking for a bond, a connection, or a relationship. I wasn't looking for anything like that, only the opposite. Something with no strings attached. No talks or digging in my personal life. No one bothering my space and my privacy. Someone who is there when I need him to be, and nothing more.

I get it. I get why it seems odd. Or weird. Or fucked up. Maybe all of them. But, but something about me doesn't feel like being attached to someone who's not my family. I didn't like company most of the time, I didn't like people who were just looking for some drama in other people lives because their lives were just too damn boring. I didn't feel like I must be surrounded by people. They annoyed me at some point. Being too noisy and sticking their nose in none of their business.

But maybe, after all, the issue wasn't the people. It was the human nature, to be curious. To want to evolve and know more. I did get that part. I just think that there's a difference between gossip and knowledge, the one that matters. So when it came to people, they didn't stick around much.

I guess that it was because I was the one who didn't trust anyone enough to open up to them. Discussing my problems or complaining about some shit that happened to me with what is called 'friends' seemed irrelevant in my case. I didn't want anyone knowing about me, though I must say it was tempting to see how people would react when they would hear my life story. Not that it was special or anything, it wasn't. But the difference was that the curiosity didn't kill me. I just wasn't curious enough because the reaction would be predictable in most cases.

***

"Girl, you're smart." Clara smiled at me with a small adoration while she was sitting on her bed with her legs crossed. The first thing I thought of her at that moment, on my first day in that new odd boarding school, was how much she has been talking. She couldn't just shut up at first, but then she got the idea I'm not much of a talker.

"Not like everyone else in here." She added quickly. She looked down at her hands while she was playing with her fingers, and it seemed like she felt pretty uncomfortable around me. Truthfully, I wouldn't blame her, it's hard to get me to talk. She stood up and stretched her legs while I was taking out my bathing bag and placing it on the bed right next to my pajamas.

I haven't been talking much with her since we walked out of the main building into the dorms, which took around two minutes walk with my bags. She offered to help me but I refused, and she made some seriously big efforts to start a conversation with me all the way here, which didn't work out.

"No, I'm a genius." I corrected her, placing all my clothes from the suitcase on my bed.

"You are the first newbie I've ever met and started to like immediately." She clapped her hands happily and then tried unsuccessfully to stop yawning.