Forgotten Past

Part IV: i dont know what to call this chapter

All of it gone. Just like that. In the snap of her fingers, in her heart trying to relieve itself, she ruined everything.

"It's fine i won't tell anyone. I swear I won't." Carswell said pathetically.

Sadie forced the urge to laugh down. "That's really comforting. No really. Honestly it's great to have your word it means so much to me. Thank you so much." sarcasm oozing out of her voice. "Now if you don't mind, I'm going to be getting my things to find a new place to settle down in. It was nice meeting you. Bye!"

"Wait" When she turned she saw yet again the confused pathetic look on his face.

"Would you stop looking at me with that pathetic look on your face!" she screamed at the moron facing her.

"Please don't go. Please" he pleaded replacing his stupid face with a not-so-manly plead.

"Give me 1 good reason why I should stay or trust you." Sadie said hoping he could give her a valid reason and she didn't just doom herself. But of course this didn't happen.

Instead he looked at his feat and said. "You're all i have left. I have no one... at least not anymore." he answered remorsefully. Sadie could tell from his shaking voice that he was trying very hard not to cry."it's not like you'd understand anyway. What it's like to be all alone." He said to himself. From his demeanor it was becoming more and more apparent that his parents couldn't care less about him. But it was also becoming clear that even if his parents didn't care about him at all he did very much about them. Sadie lowered her head remembering what it was like to have no one. From the corner of her eyes she say something glittering go down Carswell's face. A Tear. 1,2,3 more went down his face.

"Actually I do," Sadie said barely above a whisper. "I've had no one for 4 years. At least you have the option of going back. Cuz as terrible as i might be living with people that hate you or you hate them it's not even half as bad as living alone with nobody to talk to. Nobody to help you. Smile at you , yell at you, tease you. You really are all alone on your own out here. I have nowhere to go. No one left that cares about me. I have nothing except my baby sister and i'm going to take care of her as much as i can. I will do everything i can." she said barely understanding what she was saying much less why.

Apparently carswell has excellent hearing cuz he seemed to have heard every word she said. "I-I" Sadie knew what he would say "I'm so sorry" or "poor you" and she hated it when someone said that bullshit because society dictates that they have to not because they are sorry. She hates when they aren't genuine when they don't mean it.

"Spare me the bullshit, will ya? I hate it when people just tell me that crap okay?!" she said furious more by the second.

"First of all," Carswell yelled back at her. "It's not bullshit. Got it? Maybe that's never happened to me but i can imagine that it would be rough. Second of all i thought that i was the first person you've since you escaped."

Releasing an exasperated sigh, she corrected him. "Yes you are the first i have seen since I escaped but before then i was given lots of 'pity'" she made air quotes to prove her point as if the sarcasm on that word wasn't enough. "But before then when my mom and dad died i was met with lots of glances of fake sympathy. I hate it. I feel that they're mocking me when they do that."

"Oh" he said dumbfoundedly. "Well if it helps i really am sorry even if i never technically said it."

Guilt grew inside of Sadie" i'm sorry too. I shouldn't have exploded on you. I guess I'm not used to having to control my temper."

"Well now that i know how badly you can explode," Carswell said in obvious forced cheerfulness " We can get along now. Right?" at the end of his sentence he seemed to tense up. Almost as if he were afraid she was a nuclear bomb that would go off at any moment and was bracing for impact. Which wasn't that far from the truth. At least that's how she acted.

Hoping that it would calm him a little, she smiled the warmest smile she could muster. "Yes. I would love for us to be friends."