You and I, collide.

Caminah

CAMILA

Yesterday was a disaster. I didn't think that the prank I pulled on Lauren would end up in a heated argument, leaving me with a black eye and Lauren calling me a dyke. Saying I was hurt by her words would be an understatement of the year. What I felt was like my heart has been ripped out, got stabbed a million times and then was shoved back in my chest. I still couldn't believe that Lauren would say those things to me. I didn't think that she was a kind of person that would say mean things just to spite someone. Clearly, my judgement of her character was clouded of my attraction to her. Her eyes whenever I looked at them it's like it could compel me to jump off a cliff if she wanted me to. I have never seen a pair of emerald eyes that were so mesmerising one look and your done for. Lauren was a beautiful angel. Well at least before those words of the devil came out of her sexy mouth. Sexy mouth? Jesus, Camila you couldn't even bad mouthed her. I should be mad at her. I should stop crushing on her. I should stop picturing her on this table bend over and—-No! She hurt me! I couldn't want her. I cannot like someone who doesn't accept who I was as a person. I've struggled my whole life to climb my way up to acceptance and now that I accepted  myself Lauren tried to ruin it for me. It wasn't like I haven't fully accepted myself or Lauren had triggered anything for me to feel any self-doubt now. I'm really confident now with my sexuality. In high school there were rumours about me that I might be gay probably because I was always around girls and got awkward when I talked about boys. Like, my friends would ask me about what I like about boys and I would completely zone out because I couldn't think of any that I like about boys. And when the topic was about girl crushes I would literally named thousands of celebrities and would list down the things I like about them. Although these rumours about me was spreading like wildfire at school I never confirmed any of them and I have never denied either so when I came out in my second year in college the reactions that I got from the people back home were "we always knew" "finally" "What took you so long" "old news, Mila" or "gaymila is real". So basically they knew before I knew. Even Dinah knew before me I remembered the conversation we had in our apartment back in college.

"Walz, can I ask you a question? And promise me you wont get offended?"

"Yes, Dinah... and since when do you care if I get offended?"

"Ahh since the beginning of time? You know and I know you're sensitive as fuck." Dinah countered throwing popcorns at me. We were watching Orange is the New Black.

"Bullshit." I rolled my eyes at her. I was about to throw some of my cheetos at her but I realised it was the last bag so better not waste it on Dinah.

"Bull-true!" Dinah said laughing. I joined her because she just nailed an Orange is the New Black reference.

"Nice. I thought this show is boring as fuck and then I hear you using their lines? You impostor!"

"Well, can you blame me if it was starting to grow on me? You basically forced me to watch seasons 1 to 6 with you!!"

"I didn't force you! You watch it willingly."

"Oh yeah, you didn't. Because you just blackmailed me into watching it! You basically told me that if I didn't watch it you'd tell my mom I wrecked her car!"

"See? I didn't force you. I blackmailed you. Specifics, Dinah." I said stifling a laugh

"Shut the fuck up, Mila. Can I get to my question now?"

"Shoot."

"Are you gay?"

"WHAT?" I almost choke on my cheetos.

"Okay, specific. Are you a lesbian?" Dinah asked again. I didn't know when Dinah started thinking I was gay maybe I wasn't too slick as I thought I was. Who was I kidding I was never slick even back in high school. Might as well tell Dinah the truth she was my best friend after all.