A Little About Me!

I don't know what to do...

This may or may not be lengthy.

I told my mom that I actually wanted to be a boy about a year-ish ago and she didn't take it well. I have also vented to my step mom about it, and she just said that I would never afford it and that the processes is too long.
I feel really bad and that I am in the wrong body, but no one will help me. I have told a few [Like, one or two] people at school and I don't know if they like me less of not.
I have felt this way since I was around nine or ten...
I really hope it is a phase, because I don't think any of my family would be happy with me. I've heard their opinion on LGBTQ+ commuters.
I try to act a little flamboyant and wear dresses and stuff, but when I do, I feel like I want to cry.
Like, some part of me is just saying that I need to suck it up and that I won't be loved it I am trans and another part is saying that I shouldn't act like me, but I am.
Like, four months ago, I talked to Allie [My step mom] and she got mad at me and started pointing out that I "at one point" wanted to be a boy and that since I "like" to wear dresses and stuff that I obviously don't want to transition.
She made me honestly want to jump out of the car, but I'm not that insane.
What you wear doesn't specify who you are. Although, dresses just don't feel right on me.
I really do get upset when my family won't support me and I feel bad.

I am actually scared to go into a church. I feel like I won't be accepted in some way because Allie gossips sometimes and I feel like the whole church knows. I also don't like to participate in anything. But, in order to not get in trouble, I do.
I feel like I shouldn't have to do things I'm not comfortable doing and I should be who I am comfortable being.
I wanted a short haircut and my mom said, "you're not going to be one of those <Hecking> people that people are nowadays and change their bodies because someone else is!" So I kinda sat in my room and waited three days for my dad to pick me up.

Allie said that people decide these things when they are, like, five and that in order to actually do anything drastic to your body, it will take 18 years of tharapy. I don't have that time, and I want to transition now. 

My school is very Judge-y and rude, so I don't know that they would accept me. I also only know of one guy in our school that is bisexual/gay. I would still rather have a boyfriend, so WhAt wOuLd hApPeN?

I also have a lot of questions like: what bathroom would I use? What gym class would I be in? Could I change my name to Alex/Adam? Would my parents call me "him"? Woukd Mr. Principal make a big deal out of it and embarrass me? How long would I have to be on testosterone? Would people call me by my dead name just to kill me? Would I have the same rights? Would my friends stay with me? How long will my transition be? Could I have kids? Would I get a spouse?

My blood boils when people say: "people that are transgender just go off the other gender's stereotypes, like boys wear pink and glitter while girls talk about beer and the football game." No.

I'm sorry if you read this and were confused, "Alyssa, I thought you were taking a break!" I am. I just needed to say this since some people don't listen.