love letters ; tyrus

.6

cyrus goodman sat on the swingset, singing a simple tune to himself. he was minding his own business, just enjoying the cool breeze and the sound of birds chirping.

"legs go up, legs go down. that's how we make the swing go round. drag your feet, you'll go slow. the more you drag, the less you go. legs go—"

"hi." cyrus was startled by a voice behind him and he quickly came to a stop. his face was turning a light shade of red out of embarrassment. nobody has ever heard his stupid songs before, not even buffy.

cyrus looked over his shoulder, noticing tj kippen standing their, leaning against the swingset pole. "sorry if i startled you, i just wanted to see what you were up to." he spoke calmly, smiling at the boy in front of him.

"why do you care." cyrus replied, sounding harsher than he intended. tj furrowed his eyebrows, feeling slightly hurt by the way cyrus was acting.

"you seemed lonely all by yourself. i wanted to keep you company." he said, hiding his real emotions, but cyrus saw right through him.

"take a seat." he gestured to be swing next to him. tj followed as ordered and sat on the blue rubber, loosely gripping onto the chains.

the two of them sat there in silence for a couple minutes, moving very lightly and taking in each others presence. it was nice.

"what are you thinking about?" tj spoke up, looking at cyrus with soft eyes. cyrus bit his lip and furrowed his eyebrows in concentration. he wasn't sure if he should talk about his feelings, especially with tj, but he felt oddly connected to tj, which made him want to speak his whole mind.

"not a lot." cyrus lied. he kicked the wood chips on the ground, digging a small hole with his feet. "what are you thinking about?" he peered up at tj, drowning in his swimming pool eyes. cyrus' lips parted slightly in awe. tj was perfect and he was slightly jealous.

at least that's what he concluded the butterflies in his stomach  was from.

"a lot." tj spoke gently and quietly, feeling the breeze tickle his pink cheeks.

"like what?"

"like—" tj trailed off, trying to put his thoughts into words. he took a deep breath in and exhaled softly. "like why i always feel so different."

"what do you mean?" cyrus questioned, tilting his head to the left like a confused puppy.

"i mean—why do i try so hard to be normal, but it never works. my heart always feels like i'm doing something wrong. i'm not happy cyrus. i feel almost—" tj trailed off yet again, collecting the right word to use. cyrus waited patiently for the boy to finish as he looked at him with sad eyes. he has no idea tj felt this way and it made his heart hurt.

"—broken." tj whispered, looking down at the ground. he couldn't bare to look at cyrus. cyrus was the reason for this feeling.

of course he wasn't going to put the blame on cyrus, it wasn't his fault. it was his own for falling in love with a boy.

"i completely understand what you mean, tj." cyrus smiled lightly and placed his hand on tj's shoulder, comforting him the best he could. "you feel like you don't have a place in this world because you feel so different from everybody else. you question why you were even put on this earth in the first place if you had no reason to be here. i feel the exact same way. tj, you're an amazing human being. i know we just started talking, but i know a wonderful person when i see one. tj kippen, that's you. you don't have to fit into society's standards just so you can please people who are only friends with you for a reputation. be you so you can please the people who will genuinely want to be there for you. if all your friends drop you for the real you, than that's their loss because they would be missing out on a really outstanding person."

"cyrus i—thank you." tj was at a loss for words. all he could do was smile in cyrus' direction, feeling his heart fill up with more and more love for that boy as every second went by.

"no need to thank me, it's just the truth." cyrus giggles lightly as tj placed his hand over cyrus' that was still on tj's shoulder. he wasn't doing it as a romantic gesture, it was more of a friendly way in the sense that tj couldn't get enough of cyrus.

"you know cyrus, same goes to you. i don't want you ever feeling that way again, understand? you've made me more happier in these couple weeks we've been talking than i've ever been in my lifetime. there's something special about you, cyrus. i mean it." tj lightly squeezed cyrus' hand and let it go. he looked up at cyrus' face and he was completely beaming with happiness.

their eyes both filled up with happy tears as they giggled at each other. nothing could ruin this moment for them. they were in pure bliss.

cyrus stood up from his swing abruptly as the smile grew on his face. he threw his arms around tj's neck, hugging him tightly. the sudden motion caused tj to fall backwards off of his swing and cyrus came down with him, still attached to his neck.

cyrus looked up at tj's face to see if he was ok, and he laughed in response, smiling as wide as he could at the boy. "come here, little man." tj softly beamed and pulled him back down to his chest, hugging him close.

as they laid there together, they watched the sun set under the horizon, and as the stars came out, they watched them all through the night. nobody cared about the time or what their parents would say when they got home. the only thing that was on their minds was each other, and that was all that mattered.